Masochist

I love you so much my heart aches with it sometimes.
Yet you hurt me without meaning to.
A thousand fantasies running through my head,
always afraid I'll lose you for good.
Will my paranoia push you away?
You've died in my nightmares a million times,
yet you always come back in the end.
I'm scared to death I'll lose you,
scared to face the hell,
yet I can't turn away.
I love you too damn much.

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But I know the difference between myself and my reflection.
I just can't help but to wonder which of us do you love?