Evvy_shies

Okay...So i have been dancing for 6 years...working my ass off to be this ballerina that i saw in myself...lost 40 pounds, classes 6 days a week summer iintensives the whole sha-bang. I was getting positive feedback for sticking with it...because no one thought i could do it. Now im where i want to be, company member, good roles all sorts of stuff..and now that im here...i dont want it. My heart feels like its been drained into it for so long that i dont ven care anymore...Because its being drained into music

I found a new passion for music. Particulary singing piano and guitar. Inspired of course by Amy, and the board. Its been growing...to the point where i sit at my piano for hours...or sing with anything, read up on what kind of guitar, how to buy one, anything and everything. And this girl thats homeschooled, and who would NEVER go back to school...wants to go back not for a social life but so she can pursue her life in music. I would prety much be an outcast...but thats fine i just want to find people with my intrest and to make a band.

But, ballet just wont leave. It's lingering and i dont know what to do anymore. Ballet is my life...But music seems to be my new passion. I want to make a band...go on tour...but then again...out of all the bands...who makes it? Im completely confused and dont know where to go, what to do or what decision to make just because ballet has been my life for so long. Its been there and nothing else has, and as soon as i started listening to Ev, my passion for music wouldnt stop growing...

Advice is appreciated
thanks
~~Gina

TheLady

There are several serious questions you need to ask yourself.

Do you still like ballet? If you have completely lost all interest in it and no longer want to do it, then I would suggest pursuing another choice in life. You are centainly young enough to start a new path for yourself. however, if you still like ballet and want to continue dancing, there is no reason you cannot pursue music on the side. from what I have heard about dancers, they only get several "good" years before they cannot continue. it would be nice to have a music career to fall back on on.

I seems like you dedicate yourself fully to whatever you want. When you wanted to be a ballerina, you did what was necessary to achieve that. Now that you want to pursue music, it looks like you are putting everything else aside for it.

Being "comfortable" with ballet is not reason to continue doing it, even it is what you have trained for your whole life. But, on the flip side, being inspired by Evanescence does not mean you have follow in their footsteps either.

Perhaps you can combine both? Be a ballerina and make your own music? Compose music and choreograph the steps to it? it would be a truly amazing thing, liek Michael Flatley did for Irish step dancing.

One final note: I was always advised not to turn your hobby/passion into something that you depend on for money. When you HAVE to do it make $$$, you may not be as enthused about.

And you are right, very few people DO make it as musicians, even if they are the most talented person in the world. perhaps use your ballet career to meet musicians and make the right connections in the business.

I am not sure if this helped, i think i told you things you already knew. But the fact is no one can make this decision for you, and it is a tough one to make. Don't let the fact that ballet is familiar to you stop you from pursuing something else you might love even though it can be scary. yet, don't drop what you have been doing your whole life for a new passion that might fade a year from now.

Evvy_shies

Wow...lol that is exactly the situation. I dont want to quit something, that i have been doing for so long just because i have a passion for something else...that may go away. Even though i am the type of person who sticks with stuff, and is very dedicated. But thankyou very much for that. It helped alot. Hopefully ill figure something out

TheLady

Another important thing to look at is WHY you want to pursue music:

1. You love it and want to make some of your own
2. you love it and want to be just like Amy Lee
3. you want to be a fmous musician.

I am sure there are many more things to add to the list. My point is, you will not get anywhere just mimicking what is already out there. being able to play music is great, but being able to CREATE music is what sets you apart. And doing something in the hopes of being just like someone else is the wrong path. Creat your own path in life

perhaps ask others what they think of your talent. Ask them for HONEST feedback about your potential, your voice, the progress you are making, etc. Ask them if they really think you have the potential to do it.

Evvy_shies

Very very true points, I dont want to be just like her. She has just inspired me to play and write and sing. I want to pursue music because it is something i LOVE. I m writing music on the piano and new lyrics. I love it and what i do. So i guess its follow my heart or follow my head?

TheLady

What about your instincts, which are a good combination of both. And again, you do not have to choose one or the other exclusively.

Like i said before, ask those around you what they think of your music. No offense, but you may not be good enough to make it in the music business. Rely on them for an honest opinion of your talent.

Evvy_shies

Okay, i will do that. No offense taken, in order to make it anywhere you have to come to reality an relize that you may not be good enough. Which is just fine. So far my mother has said she loves my music (haha, from my mom though.) I havent shared any of my lyrics...they've been too personal lately. And im going to take voice lessons in january. (we dont have the money right now) I was Talking to my dad, and he was all for it. He thought i would be wonderful with guitar. So i guess i would actually ahve to startGetting into my guitar abd singing lessons before i ask their opinions . Thankyou so much for your help. It has helped me alot. And about my intinstincts...i dont know. Because, i kinda have to choose one or the other, because my mom said she cant pay for poth...my company contract is 1200 a year. So she cant pay for that along with the gas for a 45 minute drive to wear I take and lessons for singing and guitar or piano. (piano i learn on my own more or less) So thats the only problem right now is money.

TheLady

Is there any way that you can get a part-time job to help? perhaps teaching ballet at the school, or something that will let you save some cash. Babysitting, etc.

Also, I didn't realize you were paying to be a part of this dance company. I guess I thought they had hired you. perhaps speak with the people there about how good they think you are, and if you have a shot at being the prima ballerina, etc. perhaps some honest feedback from them might make this decision easier.

As far as singing lessons....See THIS thread to help you get started.

Also, are you taking time away from ballet practice to write music? don't let your ballet talent slip because you have become interested in music.

Evvy_shies

I cant teach their because their budget is so low that they cant pay me. Actually...i already teach but for free because they are shor t handed. And yeah this is a kids company, ( but our teacher insists its a realy company) So we arent payed, but i signed a contract and all the stuff. Im homeschooled so im not taking away from my ballet time AT ALL with my writing. I dont have a choice whether or not to make it rehersal because we have a performance comin up so they urge us not to miss. The thing i just am not wanting to do it...ive lost alot of intrest in it. And about the poetential thing. I had the same teacher for 5 years (shes incredible.) And she told me that i have massive massive poetential and that i could make it. I just have to work hard like anyone else. She moved to atlanta though as hard as it was (shes like my second mom). But she told me that i could make it, and become a ballerina IF i wanted it. And i dont know if thats what i want. Hell i would have to lose another 15 pounds. I would be skin and bones, but its reality ( its scary. though the fact you have to be so skinny.) And i truly dont see it a priority any more...to lose that much and be a stick for something my heart is not in. I dont feel i need to be that image...if its it not that important.

Jane

I honestly don't have anything to really add to this discussion. Between you and LadyJo, you've both covered most of what I would think of. The reason I'm posting though, is because I've had a similar experience, and I thought I'd let you know what I decided to do.

When I was really young, I started Tae Kwon Do (martial arts). At first, I loved it, and it fascinated me, and I felt that it was so important to me. The dojo I went to was a local place and they didn't have very much money, so instead of hiring instructors, our master instructor would try and get people to teach for free (and they were refused a lot). I started teaching classes when I was only a light blue belt (which is only really about halfway to your first black belt in Tae Kwon Do) - maybe around 12 or so, (I don't remember things like time and ages too well, to be honest). I didn't even just teach Tae Kwon Do, but also Hap Ki Do. They really got as much out of me as humanly possible, but I'm not one to complain, but rather to go where I'm needed and do what I'm needed to do.

I took it very seriously, right down to learning the Korean, putting the right amounts of power behind each move, making sure each step was precise, never missing a beat in bowing... I was excellent at it. It became harder for me though, to continue doing it when I was about a year (halfway) from my second degree black belt. I noticed in a lot of the children - even the teenagers, and adults that were coming in - they did not have the respect or the discipline for what they were doing. But because the dojo needed the money, they passed along all people that should have stayed back, gave them new belts (you had to pay to test for a new belt, and it was a hefty sum). Everyone passed their tests, if they were not doing a good job, they were given retest options. It was against all that we were supposed to be learning, but the dojo needed to make money somehow.

It really upset me to a point where I realized that I was too small of a person to make a difference. Don't get me wrong - this was a situation in which there was nothing at all, that I could have possibly done to get this place turned around. I was a minor, wasn't even getting paid, I was just learning the arts, and teaching some of them. I had no position of authority whatsoever, no possible way to make a change; it simply wasn't feasible. It took a lot of my time too; I was there five days a week. Near my last couple years, every time I went there I'd be told to teach classes, and I had a hard time getting to learn myself. Because of all these side-effects, I just slowly lost my passion for it. I still worked harder than ever, hoping others would catch on, I still thought it was fascinating... still tried to learn more of the Korean, but I didn't have the heart for it anymore.

It wasn't other interests/hobbies that drew me away from it. I'm not sure, to this day, what it was... though I suspect it had to do with my shame at continuing on in a dojo that I knew our grand master would not approve of. I suppose you really couldn't make much of a living off of being in martial arts. It sort of is like ballet in the sense that it won't last. I thought of all those things. I decided though, that I could not keep putting my time, energy, and money into a place I did not believe in. I let the master instructor know, and I left. (It wasn't quite that simple, but I'll spare you too much more of this.)

I'm always practicing my martial arts now. I've found where my passions lay (and it's not in martial arts), but I enjoy having it as a hobby. I occasionally practice all of my forms, sukis, Korean, etc. because I don't want to forget all that I've learned, and it's important to me.

I suppose what I've meant to convey is that if you really have lost the desire for ballet (and it really sounds similar to how I felt about martial arts, IMO), then take it up as your own private hobby. You can still retain what you know, and enjoy what you've learned, but if you don't have that passion for it anymore, there's no sense in pursuing it, as it appears to be quite expensive, not to mention possibly detrimental to your health. (I'm very cheap though ^.^; so everything looks expensive to me.) Just wanted to give you a little insight on a somewhat similar decision I've made... hope you found it interesting in the least, if not helpful.

End.