Hey guys, this is my first "serious" topic; I just want your opinions on this issue that I read about on the Net: which do you think is better, friends with benefits or full-fledged relationships?

The term "friends with benefits" basically refers to people who come together for sexual pleasure/relief but have no emotional attachment. The looser term would be fuck buddy.

Full-fledged relationships, on the other hand, come with a bonus of emotional gratification. I support this position more than the fwb for obvious reasons: physical gratification cannot be a complete substitute for a person's emotional needs. But I have a friend who is comfortable with her friends-with-benefits status; in fact, she has more than one fuck buddy and when I asked her about it, she said there wasn't any emotional attachment that could cause problems. I asked her about the possibility that it could happen unexpectedly and she got all aloof all of a sudden and said it'd never happen.

What do you think?

i prefer full-fledged relationships. i'm not ready for a sexual relationship and all i really need in life i already have - my beloved Danyelle's love.

as for "fuck buddys"... i' not against it, it's just something i'd never do.

I know this is gonna sound kinda strange coming from a guy and all, but I'm really not into the whole "fuck buddy" idea. I'm not one to say that if it's something that you're into, then you're wrong for it per se'. But for me there is the actual emotional atttachment that comes with having sexual relations with another person. I don't know how i would be able to handle having someone who is a friend but they don't mind having sex either. Well, I don't know if I'm making sense since I'm only half awake.

The problem with having a friend with benefits is that it is virtually impossible to become emotionally attached to them. From what I've seen those relationships always end badly. Better to avoid them all together.

"friends with benefits" = an animalistic approach to procreation

"loving relationships" = what genuine human beings do


That's about as simple as I can make it; I am about sick and tired of the MT "Me" crowd believing the "if it feels good do it" mentality. If animalistic behavior is what you aspire to, then give up the comforts of suburbia that your mother's and daddy's money affords you and move into a jungle and swing from a vine, chasing down your food... and next mate. You can't have it both ways.

I think it really depends on the person. I had a friend with benefits but I really loved him so it messed me up a little emotionally. We did go out at first but then stayed together after for the "benefits". Now that I've been in a serious relationship for several years I can truly say for me that is the best thing in the world. Having the love you want to give someone returned is awesome. On the sex side, you end up having different emotions with it, more so than with the friend-with-benefits. You actually can express your love. (Ok, that sounded really lame but you get my point). I think in the end we all want love. Some people may act like they like to just "do it" but they might actually think of it as being loved and they only way they know how to get love. There seems to be some kind of misconseption out there that sex and love are the same thing. I think friends-with-benefits = lust, relationships = love.

Im young, and im in my first relationship, so im not really experienced in the whole love scence, but i couldnt see myself in a sort of 'relationship' with no emotional attachment, just there for the physical pleasure.

I've never liked the idea of "friends with benefits". I don't believe that people should be together in that way if their is no emotional attachment to eachother. I'm not against people who do it, though, because personally I think if you're okay with it, then go for it. I saw a program on MTV about it, and it looked like everyone who did it, did in fact have an emotional attachment. I think you can avoid it for so long, but it won't last.

Sex is supposed to be with someone you love (hopefully in love) who loves you back. Anything else demeans it.

The problem with having a friend with benefits is that it is virtually impossible to become emotionally attached to them. From what I've seen those relationships always end badly. Better to avoid them all together.

Agreed.

I think it really depends on the person. I had a friend with benefits but I really loved him so it messed me up a little emotionally.

Most fwb relationships that I know of involve one person liking the other as more than a friend, which destroys the whole point of fwb.

I thought of something else. What if the "benefits" led to a pregnancy. What if one partner didn't want to be there but the other wanted the baby. Then it would get really complicated and be unfair for the child that didn't ask to be brought into the world that way. If it worked out great, but if not, it's just sad.

Good point. Sorry everyone but birth control is NOT as effective as it's made out to be.

"friends with benefits" = an animalistic approach to procreation

"loving relationships" = what genuine human beings do


That's about as simple as I can make it; I am about sick and tired of the MT "Me" crowd believing the "if it feels good do it" mentality. If animalistic behavior is what you aspire to, then give up the comforts of suburbia that your mother's and daddy's money affords you and move into a jungle and swing from a vine, chasing down your food... and next mate.

I'm pretty sure the point of a fuck buddy is explicitly NOT to procreate. It's to recreate. Recreation vs. procreation. I think that's a pretty clear distinction. In fact procreation is the furthest thing from my mind, aside from the precautions I take to PREVENT it. I'd NEVER procreate with anyone I wasn't in a lifelong committed relationship with.

You can't have it both ways.

Who says? You?

Would you care to explain why?


Good point. Sorry everyone but birth control is NOT as effective as it's made out to be.

Yeah, exactly. If you aren't prepared to accept the consequences of taking a risk, then don't take the risk. Simple as that. But just because there ARE consequences doesn't make it wrong.

I'm going a little off topic to agree here but yeah, be careful with that Depo Provera shot too. My mom works with a girl, 19, who stopped taking it and got pregnant two weeks later when she was not taking anything else and was still "supposedly" covered.

i personally am not an emotional person.....so friends with benefits is just perfect for me....i have being with someone who expects me to say "i love you" just because thats what they want to hear....

I was just about to start this thread, seriously....got beat to the punch :rolleyes:

*shrugs*

This is a tough one. In my personal experience, my attempts at serious relationships and dating have ended in heartbreak, every time. Sometimes the whole "friend with benefits" thing SOUNDS like a good idea, but I wonder, is it possible? Wouldn't an emotional attachment eventually come about it, after having slept with someone a few times? Or would you start feeling cheap afterwards, since there is only the physical aspect of sex involved?

EXAMPLE: The episode of Seinfield where Jerry and Elaine try to do the "FWB" thing. It didn't take long for them to get emotionally attached, even after they carefully planned out EVERY SINGLE ASPECT of the fling.

If you can have a serious relationship, I'm sure that would be a lot better. I'm just screwed, I guess.

I see nothing wrong with a FWB relationship, as long as both people are safe about it. I think too much emphasis is placed on sex and how it's supposed to be sacred and stuff. If everyone used birth control and didn't have STD's, I'd see no reason for the whole world not to be one big orgy. :P

Having said that though, for the record: I'm in a full-fledged, emotional relationship with the only person I have ever had sex with.

I see nothing wrong with a FWB relationship, as long as both people are safe about it. I think too much emphasis is placed on sex and how it's supposed to be sacred and stuff. If everyone used birth control and didn't have STD's, I'd see no reason for the whole world not to be one big orgy. :P

Having said that though, for the record: I'm in a full-fledged, emotional relationship with the only person I have ever had sex with.

I think you are right about the world being too scared about std's and all that.

But the problem with friends with benefits is the emotional aspect of it.

I have a friend who slept with someone she considers just a friend. And now he wont leave her alone, always hitting on her and asking her to go out. And this was only after one time.

I love how ya'all pointed out the Birth control not 100% reliable thing. I know several friends with benefits who now share a child minus the benefits. Very tough situation for all involved. A child deserves parents that can at least stand each other. My step-daughter is a prime example of this. Her mother and my husband are decent to each other for the sake of the child. While she pined over him for some time he considered her a fuck buddy. Nothing more, nothing less.Their last recreation time was a month before he and I got together. They used condoms, obviously it wasn't enough! My step-daughter came bouncing into the world 10 years ago this January! As I said I know several people in the same boat.
It is so unfair for the child, the questions they ask and will grow up with.
Also if other partners were involved a question of paternity will arise. Just look at all the Maury Povich and Montel Williams shows dedicated to that problem. You would think no one in the 15-24 age bracket has a clue who the hell the father of their children are if they are single!! I'm sure much of that is exaggerated for TV but still what does it say to the younger generation of today?
Friends with benefits. If someone can do it, more power to them but most women become emotionally attached whether they intend to or not due to a hormone we excrete after orgasm with our lovers to ensure a bond is created. Mother nature's way of making sure a woman stays faithful. :P . Interestingly enough no such hormone exists in men, therefore their emotional response to sex is much different than a woman's.
Alot of women claim to be able to resist the attachment, I highly doubt they really can, and instead choose to pretend they are not falling for that person. Being unequipped to deal with the consequences of unwanted pregnancy would be enough for me to avoid the friends with benefits thing all together if I were single and contemplating it.

I don't see how you can sleep with someone and not be emotionally attached? For me, I could never have sex with anyone I could not get emotionally attached with, therefore I will always have strong attachments to whomever I sleep with. Fortunetly, I have only slept with one, and I happen to be in a very committed relationship with him still.

But I did try the whole "friends with benefits" once. Made it to no clothes, and was already picking out our childrens names.

I find being in a realtionship is the best because you share the same feelings hopefully. I dont like the idea of friends with benifits it just sounds wrong, but that is the way I was raised you only should have sex with somone you love not just for the pleasure of it.

I tried the friends with benfits thing. Yeah didn't work. HE became a jerk. We didn't want to have sex just fool around. Then God started talking to him so that ended. Its ok if God starts talking to him and saying its wrong, but this guy is a major hypocrite. Kept wanting me after I decided that I didn't want to be like that. Sexual Harassment to the max. I let it go because he is a spoiled brat of a BOY. Because of the way he acted, I do not have any conatct with him. He turned out to be the "stalker/ creep" guy last month. Didn't like the fact that I was in a serious, happy relationship. Jerk off.


Relationships are so much better. I love my boyfriend very very much and can't think of being with anyone else. (he is in my avatar)

Friends with benefits is fun for a little while , but in my experiences with them , they all ended up going in the shitter after a while.

There really not worth it , to many feelings come into play, and if your not having the same feelings as the other person , you can get hurt or hurt somebody.


But if you can make it work , more power to ya! :mrgreen:

This may not make sense, but does a "friend with benefits" deal HAVE to include sex? I mean, can't you just have a lot of being close and hugging and making out and stuff?

I think too much emphasis is placed on sex and how it's supposed to be sacred and stuff. If everyone used birth control and didn't have STD's, I'd see no reason for the whole world not to be one big orgy. :P

So in other words people should just be animals and go around and hump anything they want? :rolleyes:

I'm ok with the whole Friends with Benefits thing... but that came back to bite me in the ass one day a few years ago, so I'll vote with relationships (although I don't like those either for various reasons... no wonder I'm not getting any O_O)

If everyone used birth control and didn't have STD's, I'd see no reason for the whole world not to be one big orgy. :P

But everyone DOESN'T use birth control and a lot of people DO have STD's, so that will never be anything more than wishful thinking.

This may not make sense, but does a "friend with benefits" deal HAVE to include sex? I mean, can't you just have a lot of being close and hugging and making out and stuff?

In this modern world....it'd be pretty hard to restrict it to just kissing and hugging.

This may not make sense, but does a "friend with benefits" deal HAVE to include sex? I mean, can't you just have a lot of being close and hugging and making out and stuff?

In this modern world....it'd be pretty hard to restrict it to just kissing and hugging.

Yeah if there is no sex involved and its just hugging and kissing, its more than likely that at least one of those people are chicken shit and dont want to admit they have romantic feelings for the other.

I think too much emphasis is placed on sex and how it's supposed to be sacred and stuff. If everyone used birth control and didn't have STD's, I'd see no reason for the whole world not to be one big orgy. :P
So in other words people should just be animals and go around and hump anything they want? :rolleyes:
Notice the sillyface. Even if I was being serious though, I still don't see why you have such a big problem with that. People are animals. Sometimes worse. We go around killing and maiming each other and destroying all available resources. How is that better than "going around humping things"? Get off the human superiority complex. Violence (often as forms of entertainment on TV and what not) is okay, but sexuality is not? The things "civilized" society teaches people is just mind boggling.

I think too much emphasis is placed on sex and how it's supposed to be sacred and stuff. If everyone used birth control and didn't have STD's, I'd see no reason for the whole world not to be one big orgy. :P
So in other words people should just be animals and go around and hump anything they want? :rolleyes:
Notice the sillyface. Even if I was being serious though, I still don't see why you have such a big problem with that. People are animals. Sometimes worse. We go around killing and maiming each other and destroying all available resources. How is that better than "going around humping things"? Get off the human superiority complex. Violence (often as forms of entertainment on TV and what not) is okay, but sexuality is not? The things "civilized" society teaches people is just mind boggling.


"Get off the human superiority complex."

That's just too foolish to even debate. In fact it is so silly that I might make it my new sig.

"violence is ok, but sexuality is not?"

Never said that. Violence is base behavior as well.

"The things 'civilized' society teaches people..."

I totally agree and that's why change has to occur, hence my statements in this thread about all behavior, including sexual. You are advocating animalistic sexual behavior but are opposed to animalistic violent behavior. You can't have it both ways. Humans will act animalistic in all respects or in none.

Face it - humans ARE superior and it is time that we begin to act accordingly.

This may not make sense, but does a "friend with benefits" deal HAVE to include sex? I mean, can't you just have a lot of being close and hugging and making out and stuff?

Good point. My sister has a non-sex FWB and a boyfriend who she does sleep with. She enjoys making out with her guy friends.

I'm still failing to see how "animalistic" sex is bad. Like I mentioned before, as long as it's consensual and safe, what exactly is the problem? Does it make one any less capable of doing other things?

Not to go completely off topic, but violence was just an example of how repressed and screwed up our society's priorities are. (You can have all kinds of blood and gore in a PG-13 movie, but if there's so much as a nipple shot on the screen, it becomes rated R.)

Face it - humans ARE superior...
Such is your opinion. I think a human can be "superior" - but the average human may as well not exist. Many of the "everyday" things we do are just plain not good for us. Things as minuscule as driving your car or throwing away a plastic cup. Sex on the other hand is natural and non-destructive.

"friends with benefits" = an animalistic approach to procreation

"loving relationships" = what genuine human beings do

That's about as simple as I can make it; I am about sick and tired of the MT "Me" crowd believing the "if it feels good do it" mentality. If animalistic behavior is what you aspire to, then give up the comforts of suburbia that your mother's and daddy's money affords you and move into a jungle and swing from a vine, chasing down your food... and next mate.
I'm pretty sure the point of a fuck buddy is explicitly NOT to procreate. It's to recreate. Recreation vs. procreation. I think that's a pretty clear distinction. In fact procreation is the furthest thing from my mind, aside from the precautions I take to PREVENT it. I'd NEVER procreate with anyone I wasn't in a lifelong committed relationship with.

You can't have it both ways.
Who says? You?

Would you care to explain why?

What Angelique said.

Hell yeah - I'm all for the Fuggin... I am in a long term relationship though...

And as far as screwed up society is concerned, I find it rather comical that we are quite so hung up on sex as the be all and fucking end all of Human Existence... I mean, how fucked up is it that it would be legal for you to star in a porno film at age 17, but it would be illegal for you to watch it? Also, you can show someone cutting off someone's breasts, but try to get a certificate for a movie that shows someone Sucking someone's breasts.

Amazing.

I'm done arguing with you guys. As you get older and wiser you'll begin to realize that sex, just like other behaviors, have consequences that go beyond the physical. For example, have fun explaining to your future mate why you were known around town as the one that humped everything in sight (that comment is not intended for any one of you necessarily; don't know you and many of you profess to be in a committed relationship so I would think that it doesn't apply). Or perhaps, you discover that the love of your life was the joke of the college for his or her free love.

As you get older and wiser you'll begin to realize that sex, just like other behaviors, have consequences that go beyond the physical.

Excuse me? Dude - I'm 34 years old. I have had a full and active sex life with quite a few partners in my time, but I have been in a committed relationship for the last 12 years. I think I know all I'll ever know about the effects of sex, casual or otherwise! Don't patronise me.

For example, have fun explaining to your future mate why you were known around town as the one that humped everything in sight

I don't know anyone who "humped everyone in sight". That's just the kind of Victorian, repressed attitude that Angelique and I are arguing against! Get the pole out of your ass!

Or perhaps, you discover that the love of your life was the joke of the college for his or her free love.

I seriously suggest you watch Chasing Amy. Don't just watch it, but pay attention to it - it's a very good film and has more layers to it than... a thing with lots of layers.

And lighten up...

Excuse me? Dude - I'm 34 years old. I have had a full and active sex life with quite a few partners in my time, but I have been in a committed relationship for the last 12 years. I think I know all I'll ever know about the effects of sex, casual or otherwise! Don't patronise me.


Huh, dude... I'm 41 and been around a few more blocks than you so don't patronize ME. I have learned my lesson on this whole topic by experience and I don't find it Victorian to have a sense of values that have developed from life lessons. For some reason there is this notion that there are no absolutes in values.

And I must say that I really hate that you resorted to getting ugly about the whole thing with that whole "pole up your ass" comment because I never sunk to that level with you. That's the kind of behavior that isn't healthy to any debate.

And let's end this by saying that we are all entitled to our opinions and to disagree.

Huh, dude... I'm 41 and been around a few more blocks than you so don't patronize ME.
I didn't. I never once tried to assert my superiority in one area based on my age or experience - you did. I didn't patronise you - but you did me.

For some reason there is this notion that there are no absolutes in values.

That's because there aren't any. We are all different, and so are our value. So, no absolutes.

And I must say that I really hate that you resorted to getting ugly about the whole thing with that whole "pole up your ass" comment because I never sunk to that level with you. That's the kind of behavior that isn't healthy to any debate.

I wasn't getting ugly, mate. You will PLEASE note that I eventually followed that with "And lighten up..." - so there's an outside chance I was being flippant...

And let's end this by saying that we are all entitled to our opinions and to disagree.

Never in question, mate! but I've still to hear an argument that will talk me out of my position... but it's been fun jousting with you ;)

offers hand in truce... :D

Accepts.

:D

I'm done arguing with you guys. As you get older and wiser you'll begin to realize that sex, just like other behaviors, have consequences that go beyond the physical. For example, have fun explaining to your future mate why you were known around town as the one that humped everything in sight (that comment is not intended for any one of you necessarily; don't know you and many of you profess to be in a committed relationship so I would think that it doesn't apply). Or perhaps, you discover that the love of your life was the joke of the college for his or her free love.
I guess you're right in that we should just agree to disagree, because I still firmly believe those people should have nothing to "explain". It's only an issue in the first place because some repressed teacher/person told us it's supposed to be. Besides, if you can't live with someone else's past, which has nothing to do with you, then that's not really love.

I may be young, but I'm neither stupid nor immature in the way I go about my life. I just think differently.

Besides, if you can't live with someone else's past, which has nothing to do with you, then that's not really love.

Eloquently stated.

Huh, dude... I'm 41 and been around a few more blocks than you so don't patronize ME. I have learned my lesson on this whole topic by experience and I don't find it Victorian to have a sense of values that have developed from life lessons. For some reason there is this notion that there are no absolutes in values.

Although I can agree with a few of your points, I "fail" to see what age has to do with the equation. It has been MY experience that there are people in the world your age who are some of the most immature, self absorbed so and so's you could "possibly" ever meet and on the same token I have known people half your age who have their heads on straighter than some of the "so called" older generation.

My point is this. . .AGE is not a determining factor as far as maturity OR experience go. I think people NEED to quit using "age" as a pedestal to spout off about. . .if you're older and have not matured personality-wise then what's the point?? The saying "with age comes wisdom'" is not always applicable (more like "with age comes the opportunity to gain wisdom" ) but then again you (or whoever else) has to take the opportunity TO gain wisdom.

Neither party is right or wrong and obviously, the patronizing tone was returned to you after "someone" perceived your tone to be patronizing. My request, do NOT use physical age as a sign of superiority (cause ya never know when a younger person might come in, knock ya down a couple pegs and rightly put you in your place.)

*just a side-note, this WAS written as a knee jerk reaction to the original post and I had not read beyond that to see that maybe y'all had "kissed and made up")

All that I said concerning age was something to the effect of "as you grower..." which, as you point out, isn't always true. I didn't mean that as any "age superiority thing."

The only reason that I responded with my age was in response to the poster's comment about "don't patronize me... I'm 34."

I mean nothing by pointing that out; simply clarifying things.

And you are right... we humbly agreed to disagree. Afterall, in the end, isn't that all that really matters?

By the way... can you translate your sig? Got me curious (or is it something better left untranslated?) :D

By the way... can you translate your sig? Got me curious (or is it something better left untranslated?) :D

No problems translating my sig. Basically, it's the Latin chant that appears on the end of Whisper by Evanescence. Roughly translated. . .Save us from danger, save us from evil.

slaps self with a big trout for not recognizing it! (I suppose I never saw it actually written before)

I think just being friends with benifits is alot better then being in a relation ship..It seems when ur in a relationship so much more is expected then if y'all are just friends.. out of all my guy friends i have a friends with benifit relationship wiht about 4 of them and the rest are either gay or just something else. When i am in a relationship I think it changes your friend ship.. while with just having benifits y'all are just having some fun..

FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS RELATIONSHIPS ARE BAD. VERY BAD. NEVER GET IN ONE.

FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS RELATIONSHIPS ARE BAD. VERY BAD. NEVER GET IN ONE.

never?
lol i think friends with benefits is good n all that.. but after a while it can get awkward. plus i personally would feel something was missing..
a relationship is not just a physical high, but an emotional one too.. ok so we get hurt n that sux.. but surely its worth it for the good times... right? :?

I'm in a "Friends with Benefits" thing right now, and it sucks. It sucks because I'm in love with her and she doesn't give a flying fuck.

It's not worth it, people.

It's only not worth it if one of the people decides they have feelings that are more than just horniness. Well, and friendship. I've had a rather successful friends with benefits relationship with a guy. We were both good friends, had a lot of common interests. We'd go out to dinner and movies and things like that, but neither of us considered us to really be dating. We knew we'd never really wanna be in a "relationship" with each other, but the sex was amazing. That was enough for us. But then I fell in love... with someone else. And that was that.

How my FWB relattionship screwed up my life...

My situation is unusual because we were both in (separate) committed but nonsexual relationships. We didn't have sex, just made out and such, but we still managed to fall completely in love with each other and screw everything up. So it doesn't work, at least in my experience. Human beings were created with emotions. Denying their existence doesn't make them any less real.

Me personally full-fledged relationships are the way to go because the whole friends with benefits thing is wrong. I know that if I had that I would be living a lie. You can't have sex with someone and then go back to being just friends. Making love is the most intimate and pleasurable thing and I think it should only be with a person who is the one. But that just me.

jon

Friends with benefits= bullshit. That's just wrong. YOu should be in a relationship if you are planning to do anything 'sexual' or whatever.

Relationships= very good. this is what I choose.

I believe that a relationship is the only way to go. There is nothing more rewarding than giving yourself completly to the one person in the universe that makes your heart flutter and your toes curl. Seems that sex w/ someone other than that would leave a void inside. Not that I have anything against anyone who seeks out "friends w/ benefits". Trust me, I am the last one to cast stones =)

Ditto!

God I love this man.... *sigh*

Relationships are the best. So many connections. Sex is now part of my relationship and we waited to see if we really love each other. We have this deep love and respect for each other and the sex has added this connection that I cannot even explain. I can just look at him and know that he wouldn't change me for the world. He can look at me and know I wouldn't change him for anything too.

in general, i don't think much of friends with benefits. but i think it can work if it's between the right two people. one, the friendship wasn't dental floss close, so instead of stepping in the dental floss direction, you step into FuBu territory. two, both people have to really be sure emotions won't get involved somewhere down the road. then i think friends with benefits would work, or at least last on good terms for a bit.

this will probably lower some people's opinion of me, but i don't care.

i think that friends with benefits are fine. i've had them. i do have them. i don't think it's wrong. we're safe and having fun. i'm not getting hurt and neither is he.

i think as long as people are safe then there is nothing wrong with it.

Well, whatever floats your boat I suppose.

I don't believe that sex should ever take place unless it is with someone you truely love and want to be with in life. I could never have a friends with benefits "relationship" with anyone. But of course, that's just for me... if you're fine with it, then more power to you!

this will probably lower some people's opinion of me, but i don't care.

Ach, don't worry... I still luva you Anne... even if I never do hear from you anymore (damn those stupid time differences)
It's just not for me, but if it works for you, that's fine.

Another reason why FWB is bad: If you're lousy in bed then your partner will fuck someone else.

Yeah, hold it against me that I was a virgin before I got with you...

Or you could make sure in advance that your FWB isn't a dickwad and will help you learn the ropes, so to speak, if you're not performing at max capacity ;).

Or you could make sure in advance that your FWB isn't a dickwad and will help you learn the ropes, so to speak, if you're not performing at max capacity ;).

I guess she was just impatient. WHATEVER.

But seriously, folks, it ain't worth it. It might ruin a friendship among other things, not to mention gettin hurt.

I can honestly say that I wouldn't turn down some casual sex or a FWB arrangement right now. ;)

Another reason why FWB is bad: If you're lousy in bed then your partner will fuck someone else.

Hence the terms "Friends with benifits". It isn't a closed relationship, thats what the whole deal is.

But seriously, folks, it ain't worth it. It might ruin a friendship among other things, not to mention gettin hurt.

That depends on the people involved in the 'relationship' (using the term very loosely). As long as the two people know what they are there for, which is just sex, and they remember that. If things change, the situation can become rather akward, and then they should talk about it. If you want to enter a FWB relationship, then you should keep in mind exactly what it is. It could end at any time, your partner could sleep with someone else, and either can end it at without a moment notice. That's the terms of a FWB relationship.

I've been in a FWB relationship with a friend, and for the both of us it worked out really well. We had both been hurt beforeand were not too keen on getting into a relationship any time soon. Being hormonal teenagers we still wanted sex, but didn't like the idea of sleeping with people we didn't know, or having to go out all of the time to meet people. It lasted for two months, and in that time we both slept with other people, and we talked about it as friends do.

She ended up finding herself a boyfriend, so we ceased seeing each other like that. No harm was done on either side, and we are still close friends. She recently broke up with her boyfriend, and if she asks, I know we would both repeat that experience again.

At the same time I know that not all FWB relationships are good either. Two of my friends were together for a few months, and he fell in love with her. She immediatly stopped seeing him, because that was not what they had both agreed to, and she had every right to. He was extremely hurt by it, and he hasn't even looked at a girl since (this was approx. 5 months ago).

FWB relationships can work, but it depends on the people, their pasts (prev. relationships, sex lives etc), and the friendship and understanding between the two people.

Back on topic of the debate, personally I prefer a proper relationship. There is nothing more wonderful in the world then being able to hold someone close who you know feels as strongly for you as you do for them. To wake up every morning and see that person beside you, and to know that it is going to happen the morning after that, and after that etcetc. Being absolutley retarded for someone is so much better than what any FWB relationship can offer.

Friends with benefits=emotional suicide.

Feelings will develop. Will a relationship? Who knows. But to keep giving the best part of yourself to someone who is only your friend is just going to drag you both down.

Exclusive relationships are the way to go, that is if they are sexual. I'm all for casually dating more than one in the beginning, so long as it's clear between all parties that you don't have anything exclusive yet.

Since when are your genitals "the best part of yourself"?

FWB is like masturbating, just using someone else's body in the process, and returning the favor.

Sigh. Sharing a sexual relationship, is the best, most intimate part of yourself. Maybe not from a one night stand, but if this went on for any length of time would you not develop feeling for them? I know I would, I did rather, though it didn't exactly start out as a FWB thing, but a guy I got involved with & I thought we would become exclusive, but what a player... It involves more than genitals, to me anyway.

I half expected a reply of something to that effect from a guy. I guess if you can seperate your feelings, or not attach them in the first place, and make it purely physical, then what is the harm. I know some guys who seem that way, but I don't think many if any girls could do that. I don't think I know any. Even if she tells you it's totally ok with no commitment, I bet she confides to her friends that she is getting feelings for you, shortly before telling you she wants a commitment or can't do this anymore.

I half expected a reply of something to that effect from a guy.

Interesting, isn't that obvious? If it didn't come from a guy, it would be from a girl. 50/50.

I know some guys who seem that way, but I don't think many if any girls could do that. I don't think I know any.

The world is a large place.

Women are just as capable of having a healthy sexual relationship that DOESN'T involve "feelings" as men. It's just years of conditioning that makes people think they can't. That's right up there with saying women don't enjoy it or ever have orgasms, they're just doing it because they want a baby. Granted MOST people don't think THAT anymore, but some do.

Sometimes you just need to fuck and be fucked. Nothing wrong with that.

Sigh. Sharing a sexual relationship, is the best, most intimate part of yourself.

Maybe so, but I'd rather share it with someone who I'm good friends with and can leave the strings off of than share it only with myself.

There are also many levels of emotional attachment. For instance, I don't sleep with people I'm not friends with already. Every time I've been in a FWP situation its also been in a situation where we both already know it won't work out. Former girlfriends are a good example of this (we broke up for a reason, we both know it and we both have no intentions of trying again).

Back on topic of the debate, personally I prefer a proper relationship. There is nothing more wonderful in the world then being able to hold someone close who you know feels as strongly for you as you do for them. To wake up every morning and see that person beside you, and to know that it is going to happen the morning after that, and after that etcetc. Being absolutley retarded for someone is so much better than what any FWB relationship can offer.
You know, sometimes you amaze me. That was beautiful.

*runs off to bed to dream about sex with....ummmm....yeah*

I can honestly say that I wouldn't turn down some casual sex or a FWB arrangement right now. ;)

*volunteers for the job*
:oops:

There is nothing more wonderful in the world then being able to hold someone close who you know feels as strongly for you as you do for them. ... Being absolutely retarded for someone is so much better than what any FWB relationship can offer.

I'm a mental case then, and enjoying every minute of it. :D :D :D

er... I would be, that is. *curses the 700 miles that seperates him from his loved one*

I can honestly say that I wouldn't turn down some casual sex or a FWB arrangement right now. ;)

*volunteers for the job*
:oops:
WOW... where's Anti and what have you done with her? :rolleyes:

I can state a fact.. lol Friends with benefits... is OK in my book... more romantic and fullfilling if your in a relationship BUT THE FACT IS For FWB... DOnt do it with a co-worker... it just gets NASTY!!! :rofl:

I can state a fact.. lol Friends with benefits... is OK in my book... more romantic and fullfilling if your in a relationship BUT THE FACT IS For FWB... DOnt do it with a co-worker... it just gets NASTY!!! :rofl:
That wouldn't be from personal experiences now would it? ;) :P :rolleyes: :D

Hey i was just stating the facts... Im a good girl lol !!! (yeah right

Women are just as capable of having a healthy sexual relationship that DOESN'T involve "feelings" as men. It's just years of conditioning that makes people think they can't. That's right up there with saying women don't enjoy it or ever have orgasms, they're just doing it because they want a baby. Granted MOST people don't think THAT anymore, but some do.
Heh, yeah...in the old days, they didn't know women were even capable of having orgasms, because we were not supposed to enjoy sex. They actually thought those women were having seizures and their husbands would call the doctors to come over and etherize their wives so they'd stop doing that "weird orgasming stuff" during sex... Oy. :rolleyes:

Happy girls like us would be in trouble, huh sariala? :D

Back on topic of the debate, personally I prefer a proper relationship. There is nothing more wonderful in the world then being able to hold someone close who you know feels as strongly for you as you do for them. To wake up every morning and see that person beside you, and to know that it is going to happen the morning after that, and after that etcetc. Being absolutley retarded for someone is so much better than what any FWB relationship can offer.

Very nice, indeed. ;)

I have had both FWB and serious relationships, and both have there advantages, from my perspective. I sucked at the FWB though... I would only do stuff with guys that I was already completely obsessed with. Needless to say, I had feeling for them...

FWB is not for everyone, but it's an incredible turn on, if done right.

So long as the initial agreement is there, I see no problem with playing it out. There is always that chance, in someone's feeling being hurt, whether it be by relationship or FWB.

Ive been in a 'best friends with benifits' relationship.' the reason I say best friends is that he is one of my best friends on the planet. And I have the same kind of relationship with him as I would if we were in the full relationship, but we go home to our respective homes and are both looking for someone else at the same time. We talk about our relationships together, if either of us, is in a relationship we just go back to being best friends, with no bennifits. We know that we could never be together in a full relationship because we would kill each other. I know it sounds very very weird, but its all complicated. But it workds for us, but its not for everyone.

Friends w/ benefits= bad idea.. end of story! ;)

Friends w/ benefits= bad idea.. end of story! ;)

Thanks for that insightful and thoughtful addition to this conversation.

i think relationships are better. i mean friends with benefits....how many times can that work out without one of them saying that they might like that person and want a relationship? so yeah relationships might suck sometime but at least you have something in one

so yeah relationships might suck sometime but at least you have something in one

Actually, you "have something" in the whole friends with benefits thing. Sex. And it's usually pretty good sex, since that's why you're involved in the whole thing in the first place.

Pretty much everyone's been saying no to the fuck buddy idea, which shows we still live in a somewhat sane world :p I just don't understand how something like that could ever work! I highly doubt people can just have sex and not feel any emotion along with it. Having a proper relationship has nothing to do with "how's its always been" like a few people said. It's what we, as humans, need to have. Physical pleasure, while great, cannot satisfy a person's emotional and spiritual wants.

Pretty much everyone's been saying no to the fuck buddy idea, which shows we still live in a somewhat sane world :p I just don't understand how something like that could ever work! I highly doubt people can just have sex and not feel any emotion along with it. Having a proper relationship has nothing to do with "how's its always been" It's what people need to have. Physical pleasure, while great, cannot satisfy a person emotionally and spiritually.
Continuing a sexual relationship with an ex is a fairly common thing. So long as you are both at a place where you can say you're over the other person (seriously), and are just cashing in on some benefits of a past relationship, I don't see what the problem is. Just use protection. ;)

While a friends with benefits relationship may not meet on a lot of levels such as emotional connections, it can still satisfy a lot of hang ups we may have. You hopefully, will know and trust the other person, maybe even more so then an actual date or boyfriend/ girlfriend.

Pretty much everyone's been saying no to the fuck buddy idea, which shows we still live in a somewhat sane world :p I just don't understand how something like that could ever work! I highly doubt people can just have sex and not feel any emotion along with it. Having a proper relationship has nothing to do with "how's its always been" like a few people said. It's what we, as humans, need to have. Physical pleasure, while great, cannot satisfy a person's emotional and spiritual wants.

I hate to point out the obvious, but most people who do have friends with benefits do not presently have a relationship that fulfills their "emotional and spiritual wants" that also satisfies their sexual desires.

There are also many people who have one partner that they are completely dedicated to, but have a much looser sexual ethic and have friends with benefits while with a person they think of as a soul mate or life partner.

I guess physical pleasure does count for something eh? :p But casual sex just isn't something I would do. I guess it's up to the individual to decide what's more important in a relationship: emotional connection, or physical pleasure.

All or nothing. There shouldn't be anything but that.

It's not a hard equation. When you have sex with someone, you become bonded in more ways than one, whether you can admit it or not. When any part of that bond falls apart, you feel it in some shape or form. By having a fuck-buddy, you're putting yourself on that line everytime. Is it honestly worth that amount of pleasure to leave yourself broken and confused in the end?

Ack. And people wonder why they are so distressed...

I guess physical pleasure does count for something eh? :p But casual sex just isn't something I would do. I guess it's up to the individual to decide what's more important in a relationship: emotional connection, or physical pleasure.
Stop drawing the line. It isn't either-or. A friends-with-benefits relationships can be both emotionally and spiritually satisfying (celebrating Beltane properly can be fun), while a dedicated, monogamous relationship who you think you love can be incredibly destructive. There are a thousand shades in between those points.

Just as another note: a friends-with-benefits relationship isn't necessarily "casual" on any level.

If you go into the relationship knowing and truely believing that it is just a 'phyiscal' thing, then you are ok. We all have different needs that need to be met, not just emotional but phyiscal too. Some people are more sexual than others, so... ya know :D

If you go into the relationship knowing and truely believing that it is just a 'phyiscal' thing, then you are ok. :DI don't know. Sounds pretty risky. Convincing myself that it's okay just sounds like I'm asking for trouble. Personally I think the whole FWB is an illusion. Another way of blinding ourselves to the possible consequences for immediate gratification. Well if we're "just friends" then nothing bad can happen right? Physically or emotionally right? Right? Who are you trying to convince? I don't want to overgeneralize here but I think the concept is many times used by selfish people to take advantage of weaker ones. "Come on, it doesn't mean anything. Let's just see what happens. How bad can it be right?"

Maybe some say they can really pull it off. I think it's a risky maneuver at best. Someone's paying a price and is just in denial.

Ok I guess i was beating around the bush so i am going to just put it bluntly.. Some people just like SEX. Yes it is true, there are people out there. hahaha.

Ok I guess i was beating around the bush so i am going to just put it bluntly.. Some people just like SEX. Yes it is true, there are people out there. hahaha.
Or, some people may have had a good sexual relationship with someone, but suck at the actual relationship part. If you have no other involvements, then I don't understand who is really losing here. Yes it is possible that one of you will develop more feelings for the other person, but who hasn't had the exact same thing happen while in a relationship?

It is a risk, but the benefits can be conceived as far more entertaining. ^_^

celebrating Beltane properly can be fun
Yeah, yeah... You just carry on showing off with your temperate-cum-tropical climate... Where May's actually bearable at night...

Bloody freezing over here, mate. :p

Still, the drumming's good fun.

:)

Yes it is possible that one of you will develop more feelings for the other person, but who hasn't had the exact same thing happen while in a relationship?


I don't think it's a question of possibility, but rather a question of When someone develops feelings.


Unless two extremely cold hearted people get together, I don't think it's even possible.


And why is this damn world so focused on sex!


more importantly, why was I left out

awww Luna you poor thang :D
Its bc Sex makes the world go round.

Some people.. just like the sex part without any attachments. Its so hard to explain i guess...

I'd rather have a Full-fledged relationship, when I get older of course :) . I am not agains the Friend with benefits, I'd just never do that, and I hope my close friends wouldn't either. :)

I hope my close friends wouldn't either. :)
Can I ask why?

202020202

awww Luna you poor thang :D
Its bc Sex makes the world go round.

Some people.. just like the sex part without any attachments. Its so hard to explain i guess...Not really. I understand the appeal. It's just that for me, it's a fairy tale fantasy that can't be real. Kind of like porn - I'm watching it, and if I watch long enough I might even think it's real. But I know it's not.

I don't know why I'm even discussing this. I already have a best friend with benefits. I'm married!!

I don't know why I'm even discussing this. I already have a best friend with benefits. I'm married!!


Awwww.....that's adorable. I could only wish for so much.

Although, depending on the situation, freinds with benefits can be quite the memorable experience. It's only when the feelings start developing that it goes downhill. That's why, acquaintences with benefits is such a better idea. You don't really know each other. your KIND of friends, but you don't hang out. It's foolproof. :D

EDIT: Holy hell...I said adorable :eek: ...I meant...fucking awesome...yeah, that's it. :o

Kind of like porn - I'm watching it, and if I watch long enough I might even think it's real.

If watching "Play Mate of the Apes" or "Lord of the G-Strings" for long enough makes you think that they are real, I suggest you go into counseling. ;)

OMG!!! those are on ALL the time! They're funny as hell too. I can't imagine that being realistic either...unless I was really drunk. or on crack. But then again...anything's possible.

OMG!!! those are on ALL the time! They're funny as hell too. I can't imagine that being realistic either...unless I was really drunk. or on crack. But then again...anything's possible.
"Mescaline, it's the only way to fly..." ;)

haha play-mate of the apes was on last night.. i havent seen Lord of the g strings on in awhile

Can I ask why?

202020202

Yeah, you sure can, I just wouldn't want my friends too because I think that they would be missing out on love, they would just be missing out, but that's my opinion, umm, that was kinda hard to explain, sorry if I didn't help you out. :(

If watching "Play Mate of the Apes" or "Lord of the G-Strings" for long enough makes you think that they are real, I suggest you go into counseling. ;)Geeez! It was just an analogy! Which is not to suggest that I don't need counseling.

Yeah, you sure can, I just wouldn't want my friends too because I think that they would be missing out on love, they would just be missing out, but that's my opinion, umm, that was kinda hard to explain, sorry if I didn't help you out. :(

Try using actual sentences. With English grammar. That might help...

Try using actual sentences. With English grammar. That might help...

Yeah, it would help. Sorry I wasn't using proper English, I was in a hurry to type that, that's why all the Grammar isn't there. ;)

Ive had a friend with benefits for the last year or so and now ive met a girl and we're starting a relationship. I feel a lot happier but also there is much more pressure to be a good boyfriend etc where as friends with beneifts there isn't that pressure you know you're just having a laugh. Overall i think that relationships are better despite the added pressure you feel a lot happier knowing the person you are with loves you rather than just being a bit of fun

I don't think it's a question of possibility, but rather a question of When someone develops feelings.Unless two extremely cold hearted people get together, I don't think it's even possible.

And why is this damn world so focused on sex!I agree that it is pretty inevitable that someone will end up with their heart broken, as one person is usually more into the other person with these types of things.

I've personally only actually had sex with one partner, ever. I was also with that person for about 4 years.. so I am not sure what will have to be there for my next experience.

I have been able to successfully pull off fooling around, without a second thought of where the relationship was going. Those situations usually take place after a relationship was already established and failed. Then you can both see things more clearly, but still feel comfortable with eachother enough to still maintain the sexual aspects of the relationship.


more importantly, why was I left outBecause you're too good for that. ;)

Yeah, you sure can, I just wouldn't want my friends too because I think that they would be missing out on love, they would just be missing out, but that's my opinion, umm, that was kinda hard to explain, sorry if I didn't help you out. :( You shouldn't be so concerned about your friend's love lives, rather about whether or not they are happy. If they don't seem to have a problem with the whole friends with benefits thing, then neither should you.

I have a friend that always seems to get the one-night stands, with every single guy she sleeps with. She hasn't had a boyfriend in I don't know how long. She actually does want a boyfriend, but guys just aren't interested in her like that. I have tried telling her endlessly that sleeping with a guy, isn't the way to his heart.. only hers. After years of this, I have resolved that she is actually better off with these one-night stands, as it is her only means of any type of interaction with a guy. I have no idea why, guys just are not interested in her in any other context.

And yes, she has tried the holding out aspect, which got her even less.

If your brain is mature enough, and you are able to handle the friends with benefits arrangement then go ahead. But you know what always happens, one person in the arrangement wants it to grow into a relationship, and the other person doesn't...now that's the part that sucks because emotions get involved and your friendship dissolves.
From what I have seen, people who are able to engage with the friends with benefits arrangement are ppl who's previous relationships haven't been so great and let's face it they all have human urges...so whatever if you can handle it, go for it, but remember there are no strings no conditions,they don't have to cuddle afterwards, they don't have to check in with you, and they don't have to love you. If you can't handle that, then wait around for that meaningful relationship.

Feeling do not always develop. I have finished doing that with my friend now and she is totally fine with it we are still good friends as we were before i'm pretty sure she has not developed feelings for me and i haven't for her other than ones of friendship obviously

[QUOTE=Fallen Angelia]
You shouldn't be so concerned about your friend's love lives, rather about whether or not they are happy. If they don't seem to have a problem with the whole friends with benefits thing, then neither should you.
QUOTE]


Yeah, this is true, but it's called worrying about your friends, I mean, wouldn't you feel like crap if they got HIV or AIDS? I would.. sometimes people aren't always truthful.

i support both.

some people have been hurt in relationships, and don't feel they are ready to be in another one. in this case.. a "FOB" is necessary, and I believe (note I) that it is acceptable.

in other cases, people just plain ol' use that as an excuse to hoe around.

i dunno.. i think it depends on the person and situation.

felt i'd throw my 2 cents in here since i have expierience on the subject :p

(btw.. wassssssssssup people!)

[QUOTE=Fallen Angelia]
You shouldn't be so concerned about your friend's love lives, rather about whether or not they are happy. If they don't seem to have a problem with the whole friends with benefits thing, then neither should you.
QUOTE]


Yeah, this is true, but it's called worrying about your friends, I mean, wouldn't you feel like crap if they got HIV or AIDS? I would.. sometimes people aren't always truthful.Caring about your friends, and overstepping your boundaries are two entirely different things. You have the right to express your opinion, provide information, you do not have the right to judge your friends, or hold their ideas against them.

Being a friend is about supporting them and being there for them, not dictating their choices in life.

Being a friend is about supporting them and being there for them, not dictating their choices in life.
Unless you're a Superstore supervisor. Then you turn into a slave driver, and dictate the lives of all the poor little workers around you. :D

Full fledged relationships are best I think, you are more likely to get used in a benifits one

Full fledged relationships are best I think, you are more likely to get used in a benifits one
Everyone gets used and uses others in pretty much every situation. It's all about intention, and whether it's good or bad.

I think you mean being taken advantage of. Of course, if you look at it that way, then it's highly likely that you'll end up being hurt in any situation. You can bubble-wrap yourself up, if you wish, only to find that you're not actually having any fun with life and that is even worse.

Everyone gets used and uses others in pretty much every situation. It's all about intention, and whether it's good or bad.

I think you mean being taken advantage of. Of course, if you look at it that way, then it's highly likely that you'll end up being hurt in any situation. You can bubble-wrap yourself up, if you wish, only to find that you're not actually having any fun with life and that is even worse.

yeah life is cruel in that way, you have to pick your friends wisely. If you try to hide from it, you will feel the pain of life harder

I think the idea of friends-with-benefits is idiotic. If you're going to have a
relationship with the opposite sex that is not just a simple friendship, then it
needs to have emotional gratification. I know a bunch of guys that think it's
okay to have friends-with-benefits, and they're all asses. So I'll keep my
respect for the opposite sex and not use them for my pleasure.

I think the idea of friends-with-benefits is idiotic. If you're going to have a
relationship with the opposite sex that is not just a simple friendship, then it
needs to have emotional gratification. I know a bunch of guys that think it's
okay to have friends-with-benefits, and they're all asses. So I'll keep my
respect for the opposite sex and not use them for my pleasure.
Have you ever thought that this goes both ways? A friends with benefits relationship is in agreement of both parties. Not just the guy, not just the girl. You make it sound like your guy friends are a bunch of players that are leading girls on as far as a loving (beyond friendly) relationship goes. If that's the case, then it isn't what we're talking about here.

A friends with benefits relationship is also not strictly for heterosexuals, either, just as any other relationship is not.

And how can you say it isn't respectful?

It's nice to know how quickly you label something idiotic when you've clearly never experienced it.

You bring up a good point, but I still fail to see the positive effects of a
relationship where both parties use each other. That is what I find so dis-
respectful in the thought of friends with benefits. And just to let you know,
I have never experienced it because I have already made up my mind on this
subject. It goes against everything I believe in. So I apologise if I looked like
I labeled it prematurely.

You bring up a good point, but I still fail to see the positive effects of a relationship where both parties use each other.


You have never bought anything from a store?


That is what I find so dis-respectful in the thought of friends with benefits.


My experience is that these things are generally done with the highest of respect for the other person, and in some cases there is a very deep emotional attachment.


And just to let you know, I have never experienced it because I have already made up my mind on this subject. It goes against everything I believe in. So I apologise if I looked like
I labeled it prematurely.

You have clearly judged it before you even understand it.

Sign of an open mind, that.

I think the idea of friends-with-benefits is idiotic. If you're going to have a relationship with the opposite sex that is not just a simple friendship, then it needs to have emotional gratification. I know a bunch of guys that think it's okay to have friends-with-benefits, and they're all asses. So I'll keep my respect for the opposite sex and not use them for my pleasure.
First off it's only using someone, if both parties are not at an agreement. Friends with benefits implies that both parties involved have agreed to the same thing.

Secondly, you say that any relationship outside of friendship needs to have emotional gratification, which to me would most likely include friendship. Every relationship we have, is an emotional connection with someone else. Although the connection may not be the same for each person, it is part of what seperates different relationships we may have. How many friends do you have, where there is absolutely no emotional connection between the two of you?

We're not just talking any type of sexual relationship here, we are talking friends who choose to be sexual active together, with out all of the entanglements that are associated with a relationship. The emotional aspect is still there, just in a much different capacity.

As for the other person getting there feelings hurt, that is always a possibility. But so long as both people involved understand what they are doing, are able to carry on with other relationships without any jealousy issues, I really don't understand what the problem is, especially since it really isn't anyones business to whom other people choose to sleeping with.

I really don't understand what the problem is, especially since it really isn't anyones business to whom other people choose to sleeping with.
EXACTLY!!!!! :)
fu20char!!!!!

The key to ANY good relationship is communication. As long as you are upfront about what you expect from a relationship, and what you expect to give TO it, and as long as everyone is in agreement, no one is being used. The probelm is that we (Americans especially) see sex as a bad thing. Therefore, if you WANT sex, you are a bad person. I don't think this is true. There is nothing wrong with having sexual desires. There are different ways to express those desires. You can be in a sexual relationship with someone you love, someone you want to spend your life with. You can be in a sexual relationship with someone who is a close friend but that you don't necessarily have romantic feelings toward. You can have a sexual relationship with someone you just want to fuck. As long as you are being true to yourself and true to the people in the relationships with you, any of those three can be healthy and rewarding.

I still have to disagree, but I'm not going to press it any further. My code of
ethics are different than others' ethics, and that may be one reason a few of
you have called me closed-minded. If you look at the question the thread is
asking, it's not asking for the best way, but rather people's opinions on it. So
please don't take it personally when I disagree comepletely with most of the
views. I never meant to try to change anyone's minds, so I apologise if one or
two of you have taken it that way. And I ask you do not call me a closed-
minded person if you cannot be open-minded enough to accept my opinion. :)

I'm not the one to say Age makes a difference but I think it does in this situation. I am NOT attacking so dont take this the wrong way. I think its a little harder to understand when you are 15. I sure as hell would not have.

well other ppl i will not judge for it but i personally only like to sleep or let someone pleasure me if ya will lol if i have a strong intrest in them and they feel the same way about me.

well other ppl i will not judge for it but i personally only like to sleep or let someone pleasure me if ya will lol if i have a strong intrest in them and they feel the same way about me. I have strong interests in all of my friends.

But I have a friend who is comfortable with her friends-with-benefits status; in fact, she has more than one fuck buddy and when I asked her about it, she said there wasn't any emotional attachment that could cause problems. I asked her about the possibility that it could happen unexpectedly and she got all aloof all of a sudden and said it'd never happen.

What do you think?
Well who likes relationships without emotional attachment and just needs sex should do it,why not? But I think I coludn't have sex with somebody just like that.