I guess I have to give some background first...

My ex bestfriend Kristen was known for hurting people. When I met her, I noticed she had no friends so I kind of tried to become close to her. I couldnt understand why she had no one,I later figured out why. She constantly lied to me and every time something happened,she always made me the one to blame. We began to drift,but not so much just yet..

She had a friend,his name was Clay. Clay had told Kristen that he liked me,basically he thought I was good looking. I never talked to the guy or anything at all. At the time I was with my ex boyfriend Tyler,and Kristen knew this. One day I was talking to her and she says to me "Clay likes you" and the whole normal "teenage" lines of bull shit. I didnt take it too far because I figured,well,what is he possibly going to do? He doesnt even know me,he would have never even found out my name if it wasnt for her.

The next day I get a phone call, I didnt recognize the voice;it was him. He called and asked me how my day was and he would call back later. At that moment, I was thinking something along the lines of "What the hell?" I figured he wouldnt call back later,not many people have that much nerve right? Wrong. He calls back, I try to be polite and he begins to try to get to know me. He asks me normal things about my favourite music,my hobbies, ect. I didnt think nothing of it still. The next day, I get home from school and realized I missed two calls,both from him. He calls back a few minutes later I remember. I didnt know what to do, I just let it ring. It rang for about 8 or so minutes, I am not kidding. He would call again and again and it would ring forever. I didnt have the heart to tell him that I had a boyfriend and I wasnt interested. I just couldnt believe this was happening.

Later I call Kristen, she acts as if it was just a normal thing. She tells me that she "forgot" about Tyler and she thought it was no big deal. No big deal? Who the hell calls someone they dont even know? I would see him at school,but I dont think he saw me all that much,we had different classes. I began to just not answer his calls at all,and eventually it stopped.

That was all background,heres the current problem. Kristen is basically out of the picture,she moved and I dont talk to her much anymore at all. Tyler and I broke up about a month ago,so thats out of the way as well. I havent heard from Clay at all either. So whats the big deal? I'm just having some problems right now,basically with myself. I really dont know what to do at all. I feel bad about how I just didnt answer and how I blew him off. I feel as if I could have been a little nicer. I have always had problems with things like this, I just wish I knew what to do. Hes going to be at the same school as me this year,so I'll see him again. Part of me wants to talk to him,and part of me doesnt. I dont know how I would, I feel like I was just being a bitch to him. Sure Kristen should have told him I had a boyfriend,but he probably didnt know.In a sense, I want to be friends or something to try to make up for this,but then again,he was the one calling someone he had no idea as to who they were.

Right now,all I need is some advice on what to do. It feels awkward talking about it to my friends because they all remember it. This has been eating away at me for a while now,its just really getting to me. If anyone could help in any way possible,that would be great. Thanks.
-Jessica

Jess, a liar tried to set you up with a horndog. How could you possibly blame yourself? You made the right decision by ignoring him. Just because you cater to your needs doesn't make you a 'bitch' or anything. You have to be okay with yourself before you become hospitable, otherwise neither parties will be content. This is Kristen's fault.

I think you should just come clean with Clay, if he shows interest in you again. he may ignore you in the halls, and then there really is not problem.

But, if he wants to talk to you again, tell him that at the time he was interested in you, you were seeing someone else. Tell him you did not tell Kristin to give him your number, and you were angry and upset with her for doing that. So, unfortunately, even though he seems like a nice guy, he got stuck in the middle of a fight with you and Kristin. And, tell him that since he was sucha nice guy, you were worried you would offend him by telling him you had a BF. Finally, tell him that the reason you did not answer his calls was, again, because you didn't want to be mean to him, and you were hoping he would get the hint and stop calling.

Good luck, let us know how it turns out.

Even though you have received some good advice so far, I'll give you some of my own.

The thing is, you simply played hard to get when he called and if you had made it clear to him you had a boyfriend, I'm sure he would've left you alone. But, than again, if he's calling for 8-10 minutes straight, I wouldn't doubt he wouldn't.

If he's stopped calling as you said, I wouldn't think much of it. You're not a horrible person by not responding to him, you perhaps saved yourself from a dangerous guy, I mean, he didn't even know you and was asking personal questions about you. I wouldn't go up to him because you don't know what he may do if he decides to follow you home someday, I mean, if he kept calling you repeatedly it would be worse if he knew where you lived.

I would advise not talking to Clay at all and ignoring him at all costs once more. If he shows interest again, simply say that you have a boyfriend (Lieing is good) and that you aren't interested.

Don't feel bad, you seem like a really nice person to feel guilty about this sort of thing :)

Hey you don't have to feel guilty. You were acting like many people would have acted. Unconciously you were afraid of falling in love with him when you already had a boyfriend -cos then it would have meant being unfaithful and you didn't want to-. So your reaction was ignoring him. That's not weird. Now there's nothing to be afraid of. You have no boyfriend so in case you fall in love with him there'll be no problem with a third person. When you see him act normally and tell him you feel sorry for ignoring him but you had a boyfriend and didn't want problems with that. I'm sure he'll understand. And if he insists that he likes you but you don't like him, tell as well, but try to be nice to him, cos you could become great friends if he understands it. Hope it works. Good luck!

Everyonoe else gave good advice, but I have one thing to add.

Just know that stuff like that is part of normal life. It's happened me to me many times..It happens to a lot of people.

I think it's just because since Tyler is not with you anymore, you feel alone and so you're wanting to reach to a person who you know wanted you. I've done that too.

You will experience a lot of situations like this...especially when you're stilling growing up. Just be strong, and stay wise like I know you are.

<3

Jess, heres my advice, and this is what I believe, maybe not everyone believes in it like I do, but I want to say this to you. Friends come and go, enemies accumulate, shit happens. Basic Laws of life. Now, you can either let utter crap situations like that drag you down entirely, live life in a dull cloud and make life worser for yourself by dragging shit up from the past and letting it affect you. Or, you can do what I do. Poke your tongue out at the situation, kick it in the balls and laugh hysterically. Now, I'm not saying "Go kick some random guy in the nuts and laugh", I'm saying, forget about it! Really, ask yourself, is it worth kicking yourself because someone else cant let her white lies slip? Is it worth beating youself up over silly things like this? Just do what I do. If its really kicking you, zip me a PM or something, kay?

Thanks so much everyone. I think I'll just let it go, its not all that important. It'll probably just happen again anyways,so its not worth beating myself up over it right?
-Jessica