Ok, well I'm often the one giving advice but I could use some myself right now.

This is the issue. One of my friends asked me to the movies on friday night. I'm not sure if it's a date or not but I'm really hoping not. I don't want that to sound mean but I really don't have feelings for him. He's a good friend but that's the way I want it to stay.

However, he is also my sailing partner and we are preparing for a major competition at the end of the year and I don't want anything to happen which could make it difficult or awkward to be around one another. Going to this competition is my dream and I don't want to ruin that. Therefore I don't know what to do/say if I go along to the movies and he starts making moves on me.

By no means do I want to just 'go along with it' - that will make the situation worse in the long term, but I also don't want to have to tell him that I don't have feelings for him in case it destroys our friendship.

I don't have much experience with this kind of thing, having been hurt so many times before, so any advice would be appreciated.

maybe ask if you can bring some friends along. Say "oh hey I know so and so wanted to see it too, so we should invite them". if he says "I was hoping it would just be the two of us", then you may need to take action.

There is nothing wrong with being honest with a guy. Letting him know exactly where you stand with him, in a nice way without being too confrontational, is the key. he might get embarrassed if you do not return his feelings, so he will need an "Out". if he denies having feelings for you, let him.

Perhaps work into the conversation, generally, you are so glad that you are friends. Tell him you know of so many great friend who start to date, and then ultimately end up hating eachother. make a joke like "glad we will never have that happen." Is there someone at school you DO like. Perhaps work that person into the conversation, saying how you like them....

I am not saying to lie or be sneaky. But, you want to make it as clear as possible, without directly confronting him, that you have NO interest in pursuing a relationship with him. If it does wind up being just the two of you at the movies, make a joke like "oh, everyone is going to think we are boyfriend and girlfriend". Oh, and pay for your own ticket and snacks, or if he insists on buying your ticket, then you pay for the snacks.

if it ultimately comes down to his telling you his feelings, and that he likes you and wants a relationship, then you will have to be honest. but, wait for him to bring up the subject. Just drop hints for now.

I am by no means what you might call "experienced" in this sort of matters, but I do think that no one gets his or her hopes up unless he/she is encouraged to do so, voluntairly or not.
What I mean by this is that if you don't have any feelings for your friend, and don't want to give birth to an akward situation, you should, if not tell him straight forward, at least imply exactly where you stand by the way you behave. For instance, he asked you to the movies. You agreed to go, which could, from his point of view, mean that you're interested in him. You could have declined, saying you were busy, or whatever else - on a polite and friendly tone, of course; this would have "signaled" your friend that you don't want him to be more than a friend. The tone of your voice, your gestures, your choice of words, they're all "tools", if you know what I mean. :) Hope i'm not freaking anyone out here... In any case, use them wisely.

Of course, I know nothing about your relationship, maybe these "activities" (as in going to the movies) are a common thing for you two, although judging by your post, I would be enclined to think otherwise... The bottom line is that you should be careful not to lead him on, even without realising it.

Has he ever made you feel as if he had those kind of feelings for you? Also,how exactly did he ask you? I'm guessing probably casually just asking if you wanted to go see a movie,but I could be wrong. Also,has he ever asked you to a movie or something like this before?
I also agree with Jo,ask if you could bring some friends along. If he says okay,then everything is fine. The hard thing is would be drawing the line if he says no. Be sure to never lead someone on,but from what you said, I know youre not going to. I hope this all goes well for you,let us know what he does say if you ask him. Good luck. <3
-Jessica

It's not a common thing for us to go to the movies but on the other hand we haven't been friends for that long. We often go sailing together - just the two of us, and he's never given me any signs that he thinks of me as more than a friend. He invited me to the movies by sms, and it was really casual.

I have been thinking that I should have declined the invite to the movies but it's a bit late now.

Yes, there is someone that I like, but to make the situation even more complicated - it is a friend of his. I met the guy through him, as they sail at the same club and get along well. So that makes my problem even more difficult. If the first guy (G, I'll call him) doesn't have feelings for me, I know that if was to date his friend it wouldn't be a problem - he would be cool with it. However, if he does have feelings for me then I know that I can't go anywhere near his friend.

It's not a common thing for us to go to the movies but on the other hand we haven't been friends for that long. We often go sailing together - just the two of us, and he's never given me any signs that he thinks of me as more than a friend. He invited me to the movies by sms, and it was really casual.

I have been thinking that I should have declined the invite to the movies but it's a bit late now.

Yes, there is someone that I like, but to make the situation even more complicated - it is a friend of his. I met the guy through him, as they sail at the same club and get along well. So that makes my problem even more difficult. If the first guy (G, I'll call him) doesn't have feelings for me, I know that if was to date his friend it wouldn't be a problem - he would be cool with it. However, if he does have feelings for me then I know that I can't go anywhere near his friend.

I honestly think that by what you said, he just wants to go the movies as a friends thing. If hes never given any signs at all,and you guys go sailing all the time and you havent been friends all that long, I wouldnt worry.If it was also casual,I really wouldnt think nothing of it.

When you are there though, just make sure if he does make a move,that you do draw the line. If you dont,worse complications will come. Try even talking about how you like the other guy,so he does know youre interested in someone else. I hope all goes well for you,good luck. :)
-Jessica