what do you think of the song I wrote. It dosen't have a beat yet but this is what the lyrics are.

My darling.

Oh my darling, as we stand here,
you chase away all my innocent fears,
my body becomes warmer,
your arms rapped around me tighter,
your kiss on my lips.
But only if,
it was real.

I open my eyes, and all my hopes of love fades,
you aren’t here,
rushing comes my fears,
my body is left in the cold of the night,
because there isn’t anyone to hold me tight.
I fall back into my sleep.

Oh dearest can’t you see,
that my fallen tears,
won’t dry until you come back to me,
but still you don’t seem to care so I....
Cry, Cry until I die.
Suddenly I awake,
my heart starts to ache.

Why darling did you steel my heart?
And tore it apart,
has my heart really changed,
or are you the one left in the pain,
of the day you said goodbye,
the day I felt I was going to die,
why so many lies?

I enjoyed reading that, some lovely lines however a lot of it was a bitc cliche. I didnt really feel a genuine flow to it either, however it was still very beautiful.

BTW this should be in the lit forum.

Wow. I really enjoyed your song. I especially liked the on/off-type pattern it seemed to have. Very visual and emotional. Good job!!!!:)