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Old 04-20-2008, 10:10 PM   #31 (permalink)
AmongTheAshes20
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You're There

Wrote this a couple days ago...it's a bit short...not sure if I'm done with it, but here it is.



I know you’re there,
The pounding in my chest,
Resonating,
I can’t bring myself to care
I lay beneath my night sky
Indulge in my emptiness,
Too restless to let these tears dry
A peaceful ache, I know you’re there
And for a moment, like you,
I cease to be,
And from that void, lucidity strikes
A day I never thought would dawn
I can stop searching
Don’t need to hear you respond,
I know you’re there.
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Old 04-21-2008, 02:27 PM   #32 (permalink)
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Lost in Space and Time

Searching for you,
Your eyes tell me nothing of today,
Delusions of your mental life,
Melt this mundane truth away,
You dream to find yourself,
Believing in nothing; searching for something,
Now, your dreams are your reality,

Oh, how can you neglect your suffering?
When the sun wakes,
The arabesque of your dreams,
Will leave your mind behind,
And you must face this life,
Away from where your soul lies,
And walk the ethereal path to truth,
A path too lost to see with dream-filled eyes

Oh, how can you accept the mendacity of that world?
Vivid are the sights;
That you take from the other side,
But here we dream for you,
To wake, and take one, truth-bearing stride,
Toward the life you left, lost,
In space and time,
But your return depends upon my will,
For you are lost inside your lovely chimera,
I open your hand, aware of your dreaming slumber,
To retrieve the silver key;
I will search for you, dream for you,

Oh, how can I allow myself to join you?
Lost in space and time,
I stand before the gates that lead to you,
Grasping the key to the dark meadow,
A chase I fear will lay us in our graves,
A whisper thickens in a shadow,
Creeping trees engulf my consciousness,
I've found you, I've joined you in the dream
The blessed dreamlands,
That took my mind away,

Oh, I know why you stay,
Too lost to breach the gate,
Searching evermore, to search another day,
The Gothic beauty in this world is captivating,
Your mind is gifted with the insanity of the dreamlands,
And mine, now, is left to dream with you;
Lost forevermore,
In space and time,
Searching for the key,
Lost with insanity...

While in that temporal world, they wait,
Unaware that these dreams are truth's avowal,
A foundation upon which their world is built,
The mundane affairs that I once embraced,
Are lost to me, and dead to you,
As we traipse the enchanted dreamlands,
Believing in nothing; searching for something,
Now, this is our reality.


This was inspired by several stories by H.P. Lovecraft and by the board game "Arkham Horror" which is based on H.P. Lovecraft's stories. For those of you who are not familiar with H.P. Lovecraft, he wrote short fiction/horror/Gothic stories. My favorites are The Silver Key, and Call of Cthulhu, though I haven't yet read all of his stories. If you're into that kind of thing, I certainly suggest checking him out. Just do a search for H.P. Lovecraft.

EDIT: I changed it a bit

Last edited by AmongTheAshes20 : 05-15-2008 at 11:47 AM.
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Old 04-21-2008, 05:22 PM   #33 (permalink)
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You're There is really cool, i love the first part;
I know you’re there,
The pounding in my chest,
Resonating,
I can’t bring myself to care

I don't know why but it really grabs me, the line "I can't bring myself to care"

Also Lost in Space and Time is really cool, it's way more poetic than your other stuff, but I didn't find it confusing at all. I'm sure to people who've read those books it has a totally different meaning, but to me it seems to be about a relationship that the speaker ended, but now they realize that that isn't what they wanted, so now they try to get the other person back. Maybe they get the relationship going, but it's just not the same. They aren't happy either way and they're stuck. That's just how I relate to it
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Last edited by AdamantEsuna : 04-21-2008 at 05:27 PM.
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Old 04-22-2008, 02:00 PM   #34 (permalink)
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I agree, you're there is definately better, I think having it short helps its meaning. I can hear it as a slow song with just a piano to acompany it. Lost in space and time is very different, and hence interesting, I imagined it as a much heavier song with guitars and stuff.
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Old 05-02-2008, 05:42 PM   #35 (permalink)
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Where have you gone?? I miss your lyrics! aha don't let us scare you away
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Old 05-06-2008, 10:45 PM   #36 (permalink)
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Tee hee, I feel important! You couldn't possibly scare me away

I've been sooo busy lately and haven't been able to write or post much. I have 2 more final exams this week and then I should be posting frequently again!

I'll catch up soon! Lata!
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Old 05-07-2008, 02:45 PM   #37 (permalink)
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Yayy do good on your exams!!
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Old 05-14-2008, 10:03 PM   #38 (permalink)
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Remember me

(Chorus)
Glistening tears,
Shroud my eyes,
Abandon pain,
Disable fears,
Enable me,
Remember me,

I lie awake,
And try so hard to recall,
(Memory fails)
The last time I wept,
Cared for something real,
(Not a lie)
The last time my breath found me,
Sleeping, resting soundly,
(I lie awake)

(Bridge)
Escape tomorrow,
Lost in today’s sorrow,
You wonder why,
You wonder why,

(Chorus)
Glistening tears,
Shroud my eyes,
Abandon pain,
Disable fears,
Enable me,
Remember me,

I try not to see,
The ghost in place of me,
(It can’t be me)
I just can’t believe,
That this lie fetters me,
(Holds me here)
What have I become?
I can’t go back now
(I try not to see)

(Bridge)
Escape tomorrow,
Lost in today’s sorrow,
You wonder why,
You wonder why,

(Chorus)
Glistening tears,
Shroud my eyes,
Abandon pain,
Disable fears,
Enable me,
Remember me,

I’m so far away,
And you never came to see,
(Forgive me)
The truth behind my eyes,
A truth I locked away,
(Until today)
Whisper softly in your ear,
"I'll see you on the other side"
(I’m so far away)

Remember me…
Remember me…
Remember me…

Last edited by AmongTheAshes20 : 05-14-2008 at 10:17 PM.
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Old 05-15-2008, 12:22 AM   #39 (permalink)
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Wow, that is one incredable song!!!
That is so deep, heartfelt, powerful, and mind blowing.
Your work is just phenominal, and I love to read it!
I have listened to many songs, but this.....this would make one hell
of an amazing song to actually be performed!
BEAUTIFUL!!!!
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Old 05-15-2008, 01:16 AM   #40 (permalink)
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this is great, very deep and beautiful. Great choice of lyrics and struture, it works very well. It definately sounds like a heavy rock song (in my opinion), because it isn't "really depressive" or "comforting", both of which sound good with piano. So yeah, powerful chorus (except the first time), tense bridge, and I don't know exactly what you could do with the verses though.
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