hey i'm making a new thread for my stuff cuz the other one disappeared lol. anyway, i'll post one song/poem at a time, please be honest, i need the critisism.

WASTED AWAY

everyday goes by so fast.
feels like an instant before its done.
tomorrow turns to yesterday.
today is here, and then it's gone.
i have so little time, and yet
i destroy it with idle things.
so little did i know about
the consequences that this brings.
for by throwing away the minutes,
i threw away myself as well.
will i ever find who i am again?
there is no time to tell.

i feel a moment will last forever,
so i let it slip away.
and the chances when
i could have changed
have faded into yesterday.
this life is like a whisper,
its only known by those who hear.
and everyday i watch go by
is another day that disappears.
but the one fear i am haunted by
is that when i reach my dying day,
i'm going to look behind and find
that i've wasted my life away.

i've wondered why time goes so quickly
but i think i've found the key.
the reason why my life is fleeting
is because i've lived my life for me.
i've lived far too long
for just myself,
but inside, i know the truth.
this life will only be worth living
if i am living it for You.
i need to let go of myself,
Lord, change my heart today.
because i can't look behind and find
that i've wasted my life away.

the moments won't last forever,
so i can't let them slip away.
i'm going to take my chance while
it's still here.
the time to change is today.
because this life is like a whisper,
its only known by those who hear.
and everyday i watch go by
is another day that disappears.
but the one fear i am haunted by
is that when i reach my dying day,
i'm going to look behind and find
that i've wasted my life away.

i can't waste my life away.
i wont waste my life away.
i may stay here for awhile,
or i may take my leave today.
i wont look behind and find
that i've waste my life away.

very deep raindrop829...really great piece...love that line about your life being a whisper, only heard by those who hear.

thanx sweetwater! i'm glad that u could understand what i meant by that line...well, i'm just gonna tell u guys now, most of the stuff i'm going 2 b posting in here is Christian, but i want it 2 b judged on lyrical quality, not whether or not you believe in the same thing i do.here's one that i wrote yesterday...i cant find a title for it could u guys help me out with that, it would b great!


i was laying on a broken battlefield.
parts of me strewn all around.
tears were my only friends
in the darkness,
and screaming was the only sound.
despairing, bleeding,
unable to move from the ground.
wondering, doubting
that my body would ever be found.

but...

chorus
You picked up my pieces
and sewed them together.
You gave me Your hand,
and lifted me from the grave.
You opened my eyes,
and gave my heart rhythym.
You warmed me, You cleansed me.
my whole life, You saved.
You gave me a name,
and sealed it for all eternity.
what a gift i receive everyday,
just knowing You love me.

I'm alive and well now.
but on the battlefield,
there still remains
the casualties of this deadly war,
who just want to see light again.
i must tell them that there is a cure,
and erase the lies with the truth.
because there is fresh air
to fill their lungs,
but it can only be given by You.

because...
chorus

beautiful piece...good imagery.

i really really like it!!!

you have a lot of talent <3

good job

thanx sweetwater and samantha! hmm...i guess i'll post another...

FORGIVEN

Hello? Am I still welcome?
I've runaway,
But I just want to come home.
Hello? Is there still a place for me?
I understand if this is how it has to be.
Because I ignored Your voice,
And I turned my face.
I made the wrong choice,
And I walked away.
I fled from Your presence,
And, oh, I was so wrong.
Because the place where I belonged
Was with You all along.

And now, I'm suffocating
As I stand here, waiting,
Hoping that You'll forgive me.
Now my soul is dying.
With my voice, I'm crying.
Praying that You'll set me free.
Oh, I've hurt You so many times,
But is there a possibility
That though, I don't deserve Your grace,
Can You still love me?

Hello? Can I be where You are?
I long for You,
But I fear I've strayed too far.
Hello? Can I still be Your child?
Your gift, I have so ungratefully defiled.
As I wonder what You'll do,
You suddenly say,
" I've always been with you,
And with you, I'll always stay."
"Though your sin has entangled you,
My strength can break the chain."
"Give Me back your heart, I'll make it pure
So you can live for Me again."

And now, I'm finnally breathing
As I stand here, receiving
Mercy, for You've forgiven me.
Tears of joy, I cry.
With my voice, I glorify
The King who has set me free.
God, I was so blind before,
But now, I finally see
That though, I don't deserve Your grace,
You will always love me.

Raindrop..

I was very impressed with Wasted Away..because I find it near impossible to rhyme and still say something of substance. You did that so well..very very impressed!

I loved Runaway because it seemed so raw and you could just tell there was a multitude of strong emotions behind it..yuo really conveyed your confusion, hurt, and desire. Great job!

It's been awhile since I've read really great work..it was wonderful to read your stuff..I hope you post more in the future.

thank u very much vanilladreams! you are a good writer too, post more soon! i'll post this song, but then i'll have 2 write something else bcause i can't remember any other poems or songs 2 put on here lol

HELP ME FOLLOW

God, You are so amazing.
You're my King and You're my friend.
But why is it, that so often
I find myself just playing pretend?
It's so much easier to force a smile
Instead of trying to change my heart.
Lord, I know somethings
Need to end right here,
But I don't even know
Just where to start.

Why do I runaway?
Why do I hide?
Why do I let myself
Be controlled by my pride?
Lord, help me to surrender.
Help me to be true.
God, just help me follow You.

I know only Your path is the right one
but I myself put obstacles in the way.
Making my own problems, I hurt myself,
And only You can take the pain away.
Without You, my heart is in confusion.
And only Your strength can get me through.
You're the one who's given this life
to me,
God, help me to give it back to You.

Why do I runaway
When there's no place to hide?
God, use me as Your tool.
Take away all my pride.
Lord, help me to surrender.
Help me to be true.
God, just help me follow You.

Help me to remember
I am not my own.
I belong to You,
And I am Yours alone.
Help me to surrender.
Help me to be true.
God, just help me follow You.

Again..very good. I think it captures what a lot of Christians feel..especially currently..and especially at our age. You have your beliefs and you know that they are right..but it's so hard to follow "the rules" and often you find yourself doing things that you know are wrong..but you enjoy what you're doing.

Most of my poems are at school...I am home for winter break..but I've got a few that I've written recently. I'll post them.

thank you for your comments. its an encouragement to no that what i write makes sense and it isnt a bunch of jumbled words on paper. God bless