Raskull's litter box - Page 18 - EvBoard

Raskull · 05-19-2008, 06:52 PM

Struggling for air
A brutal attack
Left me breathless

A hole boared from the outside-in
As I attempt to locate it
Draining blood and strength on the floor
Not angry, just helpless

An agony shooting through my core
As Im gripping my dark staind sheets
Leaking sweat from every pore
Im not scared, just hopeless

Tell me nothing
Something's wrong
Everything shows

Color washed from my face
Like health from my body
All my passion and energy
Are but distant memories

But still I smile and say
Baby, I'm okay

Raskull · 06-12-2008, 08:02 PM

Hung on old railing
Worn weak body
As a worn old mat
Stomach in throat
Blood in brain
You're screaming
What have you done
I laugh to the spinning floor
Hell what haven't I?
Dissapointment on your face
I dare not look up
For my heart will break
Hurry up, someone
I just don't belong here.
Nothing matters
Not there, nor here
For all is dark
Your still screaming through sobs
Voice straining, somewhere
What have you done?

~river~ · 06-12-2008, 08:12 PM

well im glad i finally read your writing there is just something in your wording phrasing that makes the words seem so tangible. while i can't relate to some i still get a very clear idea of what you are saying.

Im not scared, just hopeless
im not sure why but those 5 words speak volumes to me

Sweet Tigger · 06-12-2008, 08:40 PM

Your work is just amazing!
I read your writings, and love the way you word every sentence.
So deep, such strength, so heartfelt, just astounding.
So much feeling, and emotion, I can really relate to most of every single
word.
I would love to read more, when available.

Raskull · 06-12-2008, 10:51 PM

Thank you ~river~! Yeah, it's funny how simple little phrases can say so much. Though I wasn't expecting that.

Still makes me happy though.

Thanks also to Tigger. I try to write with my heart every time. And you can totally tell when I don't. Ill have more up soon

I've yet to spot either one of yall's Stuff threads. Don't you have one? You both should. You're damn good writers yourselves.

Edit: Nevermind. I knew you had one river. Nice entry in writer's group btw. Tried to reply but couldnt.

~river~ · 06-13-2008, 12:40 AM

i know it is unsual for a phrase to resonate so much but there is just something in that, that has really stuck with me.
i have thread in the literary one and a very very old one in this mixed-file section.

Raskull · 07-11-2008, 01:46 AM

Involentary muscle spasm
With a heart-felt wince
Why

Leaking on the stab
Deep black ink staining
Aren't I

Flesh laid-in name
Good enough?
Fresh laden blame

Mule work
May be all this is good for

There, pretty and plain
My face in my palms
I'm not enough

Silver orbs burn
In the back of my skull
Waiting anxiously for me
To be good enough

Raskull · 07-25-2008, 01:29 AM

I dip
Kiss, suck, lick
Can't satisfy me

I bite
Chew, tear, grab
Need a little more

I smoke
Snort, shoot, sniff
So little, so long

I cut
Burn, slice, mutilate
I'll beg for more

Far beyond
The point of want
This is need

Baptize me
In a pool of addictions

My head and corpse
My heart and soul
Will do everything
For more.

Sweet Tigger · 07-25-2008, 02:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raskull

I dip
Kiss, suck, lick
Can't satisfy me

I bite
Chew, tear, grab
Need a little more

I smoke
Snort, shoot, sniff
So little, so long

I cut
Burn, slice, mutilate
I'll beg for more

Far beyond
The point of want
This is need

Baptize me
In a pool of addictions

My head and corpse
My heart and soul
Will do everything
For more.

Wow...
This one really touches me in such a deep way.
Between having a friend who is going through this right now,
and from what I have actually overcome in my own life.....this is
really something I can relate to.
Its like you want to over come it, and get away from it so bad, but its
almost like your trapped, and being in a pit surrounded be the deadlyest
fire, and theres no way out.
As well, you have to work your ass off, to do, and find anyway possible
to fight that fire, and put it out, so it can no longer be in control, and
you can gain back all your power, and control of your own life again.
Just Incredable, and simply the truth of what its really like and feels.
You are just an amazing writter, I love your stuff!!

~river~ · 07-25-2008, 05:08 AM

i have to say raskull i like the last two.
Enough- was amazing, the italics only highlighted phrases that gave the poem more power. i like the lonely hopeless feeling but the under lying sense of power.
more- was violent and dark and well very good. i like the style and i wish i could write like that in the short angry precise way.
over all amazing
x

05-19-2008, 06:52 PM	#171 (permalink)
Raskull So Tired Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Where? Age: 17 Posts: 478 Points: 5,322.52 Bank: 4,108.78 Total Points: 9,431.30 Donate	Struggling for air A brutal attack Left me breathless A hole boared from the outside-in As I attempt to locate it Draining blood and strength on the floor Not angry, just helpless An agony shooting through my core As Im gripping my dark staind sheets Leaking sweat from every pore Im not scared, just hopeless Tell me nothing Something's wrong Everything shows Color washed from my face Like health from my body All my passion and energy Are but distant memories But still I smile and say Baby, I'm okay __________________ Anger. The emotion of change. Kill for me.

06-12-2008, 08:02 PM	#172 (permalink)
Raskull So Tired Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Where? Age: 17 Posts: 478 Points: 5,322.52 Bank: 4,108.78 Total Points: 9,431.30 Donate	Hung on old railing Worn weak body As a worn old mat Stomach in throat Blood in brain You're screaming What have you done I laugh to the spinning floor Hell what haven't I? Dissapointment on your face I dare not look up For my heart will break Hurry up, someone I just don't belong here. Nothing matters Not there, nor here For all is dark Your still screaming through sobs Voice straining, somewhere What have you done? __________________ Anger. The emotion of change. Kill for me.

06-12-2008, 08:12 PM	#173 (permalink)
~river~ Likes Stilts! Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: at the heart of your darkest nightmares and deepest desires Age: 20 Posts: 1,785 Points: 860.85 Bank: 113,665.59 Total Points: 114,526.44 Donate	well im glad i finally read your writing there is just something in your wording phrasing that makes the words seem so tangible. while i can't relate to some i still get a very clear idea of what you are saying. Im not scared, just hopeless im not sure why but those 5 words speak volumes to me __________________ There's no aphrodisiac like loneliness, truth, beauty and a picture of you. Words are flying out like endless rain into a paper cup They slither while they pass They slip away across the universe Pools of sorrow waves of Joy are drifting thorough my open mind

06-12-2008, 08:40 PM	#174 (permalink)
Sweet Tigger Pure Hearted Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Over The Rainbow Age: 31 Posts: 2,573 Points: 2,702.37 Bank: 93,648.97 Total Points: 96,351.34 Donate $PIE. \m/ Heh, you're awesome. :D - CrownlessAgain$	Your work is just amazing! I read your writings, and love the way you word every sentence. So deep, such strength, so heartfelt, just astounding. So much feeling, and emotion, I can really relate to most of every single word. I would love to read more, when available. __________________ Always Believe In Your Self!!!

06-12-2008, 10:51 PM	#175 (permalink)
Raskull So Tired Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Where? Age: 17 Posts: 478 Points: 5,322.52 Bank: 4,108.78 Total Points: 9,431.30 Donate	Thank you ~river~! Yeah, it's funny how simple little phrases can say so much. Though I wasn't expecting that. Still makes me happy though. Thanks also to Tigger. I try to write with my heart every time. And you can totally tell when I don't. Ill have more up soon I've yet to spot either one of yall's Stuff threads. Don't you have one? You both should. You're damn good writers yourselves. Edit: Nevermind. I knew you had one river. Nice entry in writer's group btw. Tried to reply but couldnt. __________________ Anger. The emotion of change. Kill for me. Last edited by Raskull : 06-12-2008 at 11:01 PM.

06-13-2008, 12:40 AM	#176 (permalink)
~river~ Likes Stilts! Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: at the heart of your darkest nightmares and deepest desires Age: 20 Posts: 1,785 Points: 860.85 Bank: 113,665.59 Total Points: 114,526.44 Donate	i know it is unsual for a phrase to resonate so much but there is just something in that, that has really stuck with me. i have thread in the literary one and a very very old one in this mixed-file section. __________________ There's no aphrodisiac like loneliness, truth, beauty and a picture of you. Words are flying out like endless rain into a paper cup They slither while they pass They slip away across the universe Pools of sorrow waves of Joy are drifting thorough my open mind

07-11-2008, 01:46 AM	#177 (permalink)
Raskull So Tired Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Where? Age: 17 Posts: 478 Points: 5,322.52 Bank: 4,108.78 Total Points: 9,431.30 Donate	Enough Involentary muscle spasm With a heart-felt wince Why Leaking on the stab Deep black ink staining Aren't I Flesh laid-in name Good enough? Fresh laden blame Mule work May be all this is good for There, pretty and plain My face in my palms I'm not enough Silver orbs burn In the back of my skull Waiting anxiously for me To be good enough __________________ Anger. The emotion of change. Kill for me.

07-25-2008, 01:29 AM	#178 (permalink)
Raskull So Tired Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Where? Age: 17 Posts: 478 Points: 5,322.52 Bank: 4,108.78 Total Points: 9,431.30 Donate	More I dip Kiss, suck, lick Can't satisfy me I bite Chew, tear, grab Need a little more I smoke Snort, shoot, sniff So little, so long I cut Burn, slice, mutilate I'll beg for more Far beyond The point of want This is need Baptize me In a pool of addictions My head and corpse My heart and soul Will do everything For more. __________________ Anger. The emotion of change. Kill for me.

07-25-2008, 05:08 AM	#180 (permalink)
~river~ Likes Stilts! Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: at the heart of your darkest nightmares and deepest desires Age: 20 Posts: 1,785 Points: 860.85 Bank: 113,665.59 Total Points: 114,526.44 Donate	i have to say raskull i like the last two. Enough- was amazing, the italics only highlighted phrases that gave the poem more power. i like the lonely hopeless feeling but the under lying sense of power. more- was violent and dark and well very good. i like the style and i wish i could write like that in the short angry precise way. over all amazing x __________________ There's no aphrodisiac like loneliness, truth, beauty and a picture of you. Words are flying out like endless rain into a paper cup They slither while they pass They slip away across the universe Pools of sorrow waves of Joy are drifting thorough my open mind