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Old 10-17-2005, 01:19 PM   saranewt24's attempt(s)... Post #1
saranewt24
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saranewt24 will become famous soon enoughsaranewt24 will become famous soon enough
Hmm... This is my first attempt at writing (song), so don't be too awfully harsh . Hope you like it and will offer suggestions, constructive critisms, etc.
Have a great one and thanks for taking a lookasee!


In my box of memories
I find pain
Hurt from those who bring me down
-Falling-

Falling so fast I can't stopped
Ever
Can I outrun this,
Possibly get better?
-I'm too far gone-

There is nothing more to say
Do you know I'm here?
You sense my prescence no more
And I'm falling away
-Faster, Faster-

Falling so fast I can't be stopped
Ever
If I can't get past this
There's no getting better
-I'm too far gone-

Have I hit the bottom?
Have I reached the end?
Will this all go away?
Will a new phase begin?

I'm Gone
FOREVER.
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Old 10-22-2005, 12:54 PM   saranewt24's attempt(s)... Post #2
Im_Broken
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Im_Broken is a splendid one to beholdIm_Broken is a splendid one to beholdIm_Broken is a splendid one to beholdIm_Broken is a splendid one to beholdIm_Broken is a splendid one to beholdIm_Broken is a splendid one to beholdIm_Broken is a splendid one to beholdIm_Broken is a splendid one to behold
I like your poem. I like they way you wrote you. Post more soon, because I would love to read it.
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Old 10-22-2005, 01:42 PM   saranewt24's attempt(s)... Post #3
Heaven.queen
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Heaven.queen has a brilliant futureHeaven.queen has a brilliant futureHeaven.queen has a brilliant futureHeaven.queen has a brilliant futureHeaven.queen has a brilliant futureHeaven.queen has a brilliant futureHeaven.queen has a brilliant futureHeaven.queen has a brilliant futureHeaven.queen has a brilliant futureHeaven.queen has a brilliant futureHeaven.queen has a brilliant future


wow, i love you poem!! go on!
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