In that case, it is entirely possible for there to be a good relationship that works without sex. You just need good communication and listening. If you have a guy who cares, it wont be a huge issue. Not only that but it's possible to be close/intimate with having sex, or even doing anything sexual.

I mean, those things are fun I'm sure ( I personally wouldnt know...havent gotten to that stage in a relationship yet) , but that's not what it's all about.


And as for you married ladies - I didnt say you had to consummate the marriage the day of the wedding. I could imagine how tiring/stressful the whole wedding day is. That is what the honeymoon is for haha.

ahhh all this talk about sex, penises, and boobs... evboard has become sexboard i swear. it's too much.


edit----
and luckystar, i can see why you asked the question and why you are thinking about all that.
it seems that a lot of people, especially younger people these days are just engaging in sex and other sexual activities sooner and sooner with little to no thought about it and it's upsetting and discouraging. i dont understand that kind of behavior myself. but we're the same age so i can see your perspective and i agree with it. it's better to wait and find someone who is also willing to wait. it means there is definately something more there than just some physical connection and/or desire.

yay for still being virgins after high school! haha *high fives*

Definitely! I suppose it depends on the person/people involved, though. Both parties have to understand what's going on for it to work. Obviously if one is out of the loop it will be a little more tricky...

And I'm with those who say there is SO much more to a relationship than sex. If not, then I'd look at it more like a friends-with-benefits type thing. Haha.

Anyway, my husband and I lived together before we ever had sex. And there were no problems with that - in fact, I think it made us stronger in many different ways, including being able to communicate well to each other.

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Yeah, I don't understand having sex at like, 14 either.

*high five*PS I'm totally going to the next NY show and hanging out with you and Katy.

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Virgins FTW!

All I've heard is how much more special sex is if it's with the one person you plan to spend the rest of your life with. So even though it might be hard, IMO it's totally worth it to wait until marriage. Less emphasis on sex means more emphasis on communicating and building the relationship.

I think it's also important to discuss this with your significant other, so there's no misunderstandings. If you're going to wait, it's critical that your boyfriend or girlfriend is going to as well.

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Need Ev sheet music? <now including All That I'm Living For, Good Enough, Lithium, and The Last Song I'm Wasting on You.

I have thought about this for quite a while, possibly since July or so due to something that happened then.

Personally, I'd suggest waiting. Something like sex should be with someone you really love, not with every person you are with. Liking someone and having sex with him/her is SO much more different than being in love with someone and having sex with him/her.

There is SO much more to being in a relationship than sex, believe me. And if sex is all you want, you should probably get your priorities straightened out OR go find someone who wants the same thing as you. I can guarantee the latter probably won't work out in the end.

I also don't believe you should have sex with someone you are with at the moment just because they've been your significant other for less than a month, because that's just pathetic, IMO. You really can't force yourself to do something you aren't ready for though. Why the rush?

And one more thing... if your significant other isn't willing to wait when you are, then he/she is not right for you. Having patience with each other is key if you're to be together for a while.

It's just my opinion though. I really don't have experience in it all, but I do know what I do and don't believe in. Especially since I've given it quite a bit of thought for the past 3 months.

edit: sorry for my ramblyness and it all being messy. I knew it was... Don't mind it. >.>

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You shouldn't be worried about not having a successful relationship if you want to abstain from sex until marriage. There are a lot of people out there that have those same beliefs, but it is important to be upfront about that. (I mean if you've been seeing someone for some time and the subject of intimacy comes up, then that's a good time to disclose your feelings.) Yeah, don't worry about it at all. No shame in it at all and there's definitely no saying you won't find a successful relationship unless you're willing to have sex. That's silly.

All I can say is -- YOUR POOR HUSBANDS! MAN!! My heart goes out to them for real. <3 Those poor guys!! Aww. I feel so sad for them. And Cavercheer... if he's still complaing, trust me, he's allowed. You'll just have to put up with it, lol.

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The short answer is yes. Most of my relationships are without sex (friends are technically relationships), though if you mean romantic relationships it becomes more complicated.

As to whether you can have a successful romantic relationship without sex, I suppose that depends on what you mean by "successful." It also depends on how you both feel about it.

If one party wants it and the other one does not, then in a monogamous relationship it can be very difficult to maintain the relationship for a long period of time. If the relationship is purely platonic by mutual consent, then is it really a romantic relationship? (this is a question with an answer that only is true within your individual frame).

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"'Love' is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own... Jealousy is a disease, love is a healthy condition. The immature mind often mistakes one for the other, or assumes that the greater the love, the greater the jealousy. " -- R. A. Heinlein

Again my curiosity prompts me... did you have any ideas in mind of what she may have meant by "successful" - I'd die to hear your thoughts (not really, but I'm kind of surprised you suggested that there are a plethora of meanings of successful in this context, or at least those that LuckyStar may be referring to).

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Not any singular and specific ones, no. What is "successful" depends on each individual. Some people may define a successful relationship as having an enjoyable evening, others aren't happy with a relationship unless it has serious marriage potential with a desire for offspring as part of the deal.

Now, based on LuckyStar's followup posts, she clearly wants a sustained romantic dating relationship with her boyfriend, who she has a strong sexual attraction to. The problem is: that is a process, not a product. It doesn't tell me what her goals are within the scope of the relationship. Thus, the question is, what does she want out of it and, just as importantly, what does he want out of it and in what kind of timeframe do these desires track.

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"'Love' is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own... Jealousy is a disease, love is a healthy condition. The immature mind often mistakes one for the other, or assumes that the greater the love, the greater the jealousy. " -- R. A. Heinlein

Haha I have no boyfriend.

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