^^ Damned straight. I'll wait till I've got a ring to be crazy about it.

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I've gone out with quite a few women, well DATED quite a few women and have only had sex with two of them. I don't just jump into bed with someone, it's not right, at least in my opinion. The two women I have been with I knew for years ahead of time with no sex in the relationship whatsoever. I think relationships are so much better if you establish them first and then wait for sex until it's the right moment, you know? Having sex with one of the girls actually ended the relationship, not cause I'm horrible in the sack, but for private reasons. Anyway that's my opinion. And don't feel bad about being a virgin I still am one when it comes to men.

~Monica

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"How do you know you're crazy unless someone tells you? And how do you know THEY aren't?"--John Munch

It's actually been proven that having sex too quickly in a relationship will actually devalue you both and the relationship's chances of growing and maturing, so you are already comprising the kind of relationship you could have with the other person. It may also risk the kind of deeper relationship you may have been able to have, had you not jumped in bed right away. I quickly found one article on the subject: When To Have Sex in a New Relationship.

No one should ever feel bad about being a virgin. There's is absolutely no reason to feel bad about that, and you should never let anyone feel as though you should feel bad about it.

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A few days ago, I was talking to a guy friend I met online and somehow the topic turned to sex. XD
he's embarrassed as all hell about being a virgin. We talked about sex and the like for a few hours, and I tried explaining to him that being a virgin is nothing to be ashamed about.

He said that he's 20, and all of his friends have done it, and when they talk about it, it makes him feel like a loser, which pisses me off. Not at him, but at society.

However, he did say he wants to wait until the right person comes around. Which I think is admirable.

I'm still a virgin, and I could care less. I'm also waiting.

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"Men kick friendship around like a football and it doesn't seem to crack. Women treat it like glass and it falls to pieces"

Um, you're a girl.

Guys have a WAYYYYY different persepctive on virginity and they have a lot MORE pressure than girls to have sex. It's a lot harder to explain to guys that it's not a big deal being a virgin, lol.

And boy does this post remind me of a good idea for a thread...

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This is very true Jane. I kinda hate the seperate set of standards that men and women have when it comes to sex. The one that really bothers me is the fact that a guy such as my self can run around and screw whomever he pleases as often as he likes and that makes him a "stud", but if a woman were to do the same thing, she would be labeled a slut. I hate that. It is disrespectful.

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THANK YOU! I'm glad there's at least one man out there who sees it that way. \m/

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You are not at all the person you appear to be Vince. You sound like a real gentleman.

One of my guy friends once explained his first time having sex. He said that this girl asked him once (she was several years older and much more experienced... and a slut herself, in fact, they were both babysitting her newborn baby, lol...) and he decided to do it. He told me that he made the decision because all he could think about were his buddies and his older brother, and if they ever found out he had the chance to sleep with an older woman, he'd never live it down. Guys have a lot of pressure to sleep with as many woman as possible and to lose their virginity soon.

AHH, and I forgot all about starting my thread yesterday!

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*brings thread back from the dead*

But how soon is too soon? Are you implying that there is a set amount of time you should wait before you have sex? I believe in waiting to have sex in relationships until it's something you are both ready for. I don't believe in waiting beyond that point simply for the sake of waiting.

I first became intimate with my boyfriend in a relatively short amount of time according to most people's standards. He was absolutely fine with waiting as long as I wanted to (even though he hadn't had sex in 5 years) because he's a good guy like. I had thought about waiting longer until I realized that it felt right and it just doesn't make sense to wait when it feels right.

I also wanted to add that I entirely disagree with people saying that sex is something that should be reserved for relationships and should equal commitment. While I respect your right to have that opinion, I think it should be stated as opinion, not fact. I think that there's nothing wrong with casual sex as long as you're careful about it. But that's just my opinion.

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There is only one Return and it's not of the King, it's of the Jedi.

I wasn't implying anything more than the fact that focusing on sex too soon in a relationship may be detrimental to that relationship. Obviously the issue of when to have sex varies, because people are different, we all have different beliefs, and things are more complicated than that when we find someone to fall in love with. As for something like waiting for marriage, it's a personal choice. I don't believe anyone on here was condemning anyone else for not sharing that belief; everyone is entitled to live life as they want.

I'd like you to point out where any one of us attempted to state that as a fact rather than our opinion. Sure it happens, sure some of us disagree with it and wish it wouldn't happen, but as I stated before, people make their own choices in life and they have a right to do so. Yeah, I don't believe there's such a thing as casual sex, or that there should be such a thing; however, I'm not going to condemn someone else for believing in it or participating in it. Just because I personally disagree with someone else doesn't mean I'm going to judge them for choosing to live the way they do. I think the entire subject of sex is largely about opinions, beliefs, and personal preferences; we all have to respect each other for having individual and differing opinions.

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