Shiver's -Reflections- - Page 37 - EvBoard

~river~ · 04-02-2008, 08:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shivercide

In certain moments
the breathing
flows constricted...
an emotional torrent
has blocked it off
and choked
any chance of tears
from forming.

In this moment,
when I cannot cry,
I shall write instead.

I realize
that upon looking away
for even just one moment...
it will still sneak up
and overtake me.
Every drop of profound feeling -
from the ecstatic happiness
to the mindnumbing
ache
that emits from the core
of my soul.

Today,
the latter became tough
to handle.

The pain -
it's coursing through my veins,
burning
to reside in my fingertips...
and then starting all over
with the next beat
of my heart.

It's a raging river of thoughts
and contrasting emotions,
and so much feeling for another
(that holds such a depth
of which there is
no bottom)
that I can only give into
and be forever
carried away...

...forever swept away
in you.

wooooooooooow steph *draw drops and hits the floor*
just so raw and so beautiful

Shivercide · 04-03-2008, 02:20 AM

Tired eyes burn,
flowing light stabbing vision,
but the darkness
would swallow me
to nonexistance.

Just let it come,
let the sleep rush into me
and
beg it not to hurt.

My eyes, they close,
as painful light
tries prying its way through
and slash at visions
horrid.

I will focus, as I fade...
push myself to escape
the very worst parts
of myself.

Run away...
I wish to run away from me.

To leave myself,
these thoughts behind
and forever lose myself
to you
instead.

I don't want this empty air.
I only want to breathe you in...

Sweet Tigger · 04-03-2008, 02:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shivercide

Tired eyes burn,
flowing light stabbing vision,
but the darkness
would swallow me
to nonexistance.

Just let it come,
let the sleep rush into me
and
beg it not to hurt.

My eyes, they close,
as painful light
tries prying its way through
and slash at visions
horrid.

I will focus, as I fade...
push myself to escape
the very worst parts
of myself.

Run away...
I wish to run away from me.

To leave myself,
these thoughts behind
and forever lose myself
to you
instead.

I don't want this empty air.
I only want to breathe you in...

Wow Steph......

That is really deep, and heavey.
It really says so much, and expresses so much inner emotions, and feelings.
Understanding what it means, and I think you have an incredable way,
of expressing exactly what you are feeling.
Everyword you write is amazing, and I only wish to keep reading
more!!
I love, and really admire all your work!!
<3

Silver Wing · 04-03-2008, 04:01 AM

Steph, I've said it before, you really should look at publication. Your work is really very good.

I found a website that talks about getting published - http://www.poets.org/page.php/prmID/56
might be worth your while to take a look.

Really, I think you have professional abilities. A lot of your poetry is, IMHO, better than some of the garbage they made us read in college. I'd read you over Ginsberg any day of the week. I like the way you don't rely solely on verse to convey the feeling in your art. Altering the font size, the color, all of your subtle and not-so-subtle integrations (like using the first letter or line of a work to create a poem-in-a-poem) make this so much more than simple verse. This stuff is in many ways visual art, not just simple poetry. I think your poetry is very reminsicent of imagism, and I really think that as a writer you would gain much satisfaction from sharing your poetry with the world.

Just my two cents, but that's what I think.

~river~ · 04-08-2008, 06:22 AM

Tired eyes burn,
flowing light stabbing vision,
but the darkness
would swallow me
to nonexistance.

love this part just a beautiful introduction but harsh and very much creates the image i assume you were trying to create

Shivercide · 04-09-2008, 11:28 AM

Icy needles -
they hail down
from pockets in the sky.

I just stand there
amidst the downpour;
let it drench me
let it puncture chills throughout.

I shall cry alongside it,
and no one will notice.
I don't want them to notice
the true pain
that I really feel inside.

It's never happened before.
Never felt my heart held
so tightly (lovingly) together,
while at the same time
feel it shattered,
so broken.

For now I just want to stand here.
To feel this cold consume me,
to soak inside my confused tears
of which only the rain knows.

Sweet Tigger · 04-09-2008, 12:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shivercide

Icy needles -
they hail down
from pockets in the sky.

I just stand there
amidst the downpour;
let it drench me
let it puncture chills throughout.

I shall cry alongside it,
and no one will notice.
I don't want them to notice
the true pain
that I really feel inside.

It's never happened before.
Never felt my heart held
so tightly (lovingly) together,
while at the same time
feel it shattered,
so broken.

For now I just want to stand here.
To feel this cold consume me,
to soak inside my confused tears
of which only the rain knows.

Wow Steph.

Every word you wrote, I can feel just all your feelings, and emotions.
I have never seen anything writen this way, just the way you descibe
things, in such a very unique way, words can't describe how heartful
it is.
As well as, how deep, and touching it really is.
It is so amazing, just how well you can actually picture this all visualy.
And how real this all really is.
Astounding work, as usual!!!
Your work, is very inspirering!!

<3

Selfish&Cold · 04-14-2008, 03:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shivercide

In certain moments
the breathing
flows constricted...
an emotional torrent
has blocked it off
and choked
any chance of tears
from forming.

In this moment,
when I cannot cry,
I shall write instead.

I realize
that upon looking away
for even just one moment...
it will still sneak up
and overtake me.
Every drop of profound feeling -
from the ecstatic happiness
to the mindnumbing
ache
that emits from the core
of my soul.

Today,
the latter became tough
to handle.

The pain -
it's coursing through my veins,
burning
to reside in my fingertips...
and then starting all over
with the next beat
of my heart.

It's a raging river of thoughts
and contrasting emotions,
and so much feeling for another
(that holds such a depth
of which there is
no bottom)
that I can only give into
and be forever
carried away...

...forever swept away
in you.

Umm, fucking wow!

Shivercide · 05-07-2008, 02:32 AM

Distant sun,
I can feel you...
rays of warmth
washing over me
bringing smiles
in my sleep

and unwavering.

Distant sun,
I can see you;
and at night you are the stars,
never fading from the reflection
of eyes so wet
and torn.

But when I reach
and try to grasp,
my fingertips
miss by millions
of miles.

Empty air separates
and surrounds;
suffocating stabbings
of the knowledge,
of craving,
and not having
what I'd ever truly want.

Millions of miles.

Starlit flowers,
blooming always in my soul,
and nurtured only by you.

Will eventually I stagger anyway?
Will I watch other's lives
flow
ahead of me...
will I become lost in the distance?

My distant sun -
my only sun,
I feel you.

I feel you,
and ache to be just close enough...
to touch.

04-03-2008, 02:20 AM	#362 (permalink)
Shivercide burn my heart to dust Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 3,470 Points: 9,499.75 Bank: 18,771,948.56 Total Points: 18,781,448.31 Donate	Inhale Tired eyes burn, flowing light stabbing vision, but the darkness would swallow me to nonexistance. Just let it come, let the sleep rush into me and beg it not to hurt. My eyes, they close, as painful light tries prying its way through and slash at visions horrid. I will focus, as I fade... push myself to escape the very worst parts of myself. Run away... I wish to run away from me. To leave myself, these thoughts behind and forever lose myself to you instead. I don't want this empty air. I only want to breathe you in...

04-08-2008, 06:22 AM	#365 (permalink)
~river~ Lips Like Morphine Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: at the heart of your darkest nightmares and deepest desires Age: 20 Posts: 2,015 Points: 874.09 Bank: 209,972.92 Total Points: 210,847.00 Donate	Tired eyes burn, flowing light stabbing vision, but the darkness would swallow me to nonexistance. love this part just a beautiful introduction but harsh and very much creates the image i assume you were trying to create __________________ Breathe for love tomorrow Cause there's no hope for today Breathe for love tomorrow Cause maybe there's another way Today's the day when the dreaming ends...

05-07-2008, 02:32 AM	#369 (permalink)
Shivercide burn my heart to dust Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 3,470 Points: 9,499.75 Bank: 18,771,948.56 Total Points: 18,781,448.31 Donate	Distant Distant sun, I can feel you... rays of warmth washing over me bringing smiles in my sleep and unwavering. Distant sun, I can see you; and at night you are the stars, never fading from the reflection of eyes so wet and torn. But when I reach and try to grasp, my fingertips miss by millions of miles. Empty air separates and surrounds; suffocating stabbings of the knowledge, of craving, and not having what I'd ever truly want. Millions of miles. Starlit flowers, blooming always in my soul, and nurtured only by you. Will eventually I stagger anyway? Will I watch other's lives flow ahead of me... will I become lost in the distance? My distant sun - my only sun, I feel you. I feel you, and ache to be just close enough... to touch.

04-03-2008, 04:01 AM	#364 (permalink)
Silver Wing Hungry. Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 477 Points: 4,900.00 Bank: 77,121.86 Total Points: 82,021.87 Donate	Steph, I've said it before, you really should look at publication. Your work is really very good. I found a website that talks about getting published - http://www.poets.org/page.php/prmID/56 might be worth your while to take a look. Really, I think you have professional abilities. A lot of your poetry is, IMHO, better than some of the garbage they made us read in college. I'd read you over Ginsberg any day of the week. I like the way you don't rely solely on verse to convey the feeling in your art. Altering the font size, the color, all of your subtle and not-so-subtle integrations (like using the first letter or line of a work to create a poem-in-a-poem) make this so much more than simple verse. This stuff is in many ways visual art, not just simple poetry. I think your poetry is very reminsicent of imagism, and I really think that as a writer you would gain much satisfaction from sharing your poetry with the world. Just my two cents, but that's what I think.

04-09-2008, 11:28 AM	#366 (permalink)
Shivercide burn my heart to dust Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 3,470 Points: 9,499.75 Bank: 18,771,948.56 Total Points: 18,781,448.31 Donate	Icy needles - they hail down from pockets in the sky. I just stand there amidst the downpour; let it drench me let it puncture chills throughout. I shall cry alongside it, and no one will notice. I don't want them to notice the true pain that I really feel inside. It's never happened before. Never felt my heart held so tightly (lovingly) together, while at the same time feel it shattered, so broken. For now I just want to stand here. To feel this cold consume me, to soak inside my confused tears of which only the rain knows.