The Imprint is Always There - Page 11 - EvBoard

SangReal · 01-11-2005, 02:44 PM

If I ever had one wish
I would be that you would die
Disappear off the scorched face of the earth
So I wouldn't hear your screams, and
So you wouldn't haunt my dreams

If I had a choice
A place to push rewind
And wind you firmly out of my mind
Don't doubt for a moment I'd do it
Because you never told me the truth

I hope that you never knew
That everything you said was a lie
I hope you were an innocent bystander
To someone else's deception

I know this seems a grim set of wishes
An evil combination of desires
But it would all be for your own good
Even while ruining mine

Good day

SangReal · 06-15-2005, 05:33 PM

Note: This is a work of absolute fiction. It resembles no one, and if it does, the resemblance is purely coincidental (if you believe in coincidence, that is).

You had lain in darkness for ages, our prayers over you growing fitful, our doubts increasing with each day, and our love stretching like a cat in the sun that has frozen in an uncomfortable position. We had just begun to lose it all, this wild hope that you were in there (somewhere) when the slightest graze of a finger over mine brought us all back to the beginning. We thought we saw it, but vision has a way of corrupting itself to allow us our dreams. I could not convince myself that I was awake, much less that you were after forever being "dead."

I hated him for so long (careless driver, ex-lover) that I don't quite know what to feel. We were so close to the end of the line...to homicide. Such a dirty word that is, one man killing another, the ultimate desecration of the ultimate creation. Homicide. I shudder at the very murmur of the sound.

So you moved, we thought. We were not sure. Tests were inconclusive, all that doctor gibberish that really means nobody knows. Doctors, with all their years of hard work and training, do not seem to be able to bear those three words: I don't know. It is not so difficult, is it, to admit that there is much we cannot know?

And then with a heave of your chest, you drew the first breath into lungs that had not breathed on their own in months. Or so we thought. We were so afraid to remove the machines to test our little hypothesis. But we did, and you did, and all was well. We spoke to you, and you squeezed our hands. Hard to think it was you, once so alive. You were still a shadow of yourself, not life yet but certainly not death.

The next day we all stood in a circle around you, and to our disbelief, your eyes opened. We did not know what to say or do except rejoice about you. Our prayers answered somewhat, but consciousness was not enough.

It was a week or two before you spoke to us, but a whisper but still a sound from a throat we'd thought would never speak again. The words, however, were as stunning as the revelation of your rebirth. "Where am I, and who are you?"

You did not know your own mother or father, and you did not know me, flesh of your flesh, bone of your bone. My heart was broken. I had prayed for your survival and not thought of my own, and in the process I'd lost the only thing I ever loved with all of me.

I am lucky, I suppose, that you wanted to know me afterwards at all. All your old memories now come from albums and videos and not from actual remembrance, but I don't mind, I suppose. You did not love me at first, which is natural, I guess, for someone who is a complete stranger. (How odd it must seem to live in a world full of strangers. I'm sure you have insights like newborns now.) We played endless card games you'd forgotten, talked for hours, and went for ice cream every day. We ordered in pizza on Fridays and looked through pictures. I thought it was unfair that you didn't know anyone, so I resolved to teach you. You wanted to watch TV to discover the world again. And then, one beautiful day, you proposed to me.

So here I sit, already your wife, dressed in pristine white, prepared to walk down the aisle again, this time for your sake. You make some silly joke about how it all seems redundant to everyone else, but it means a lot to you. So I will walk down the aisle and say "I do" again, kiss you again, cut the cake again, take endless pictures again, throw the bouquet again, and enjoy our wedding night...again.

I hope this letter can do justice to the strength of our love through trial and tribulation. God is looking down with joy. Again.

SangReal · 09-07-2006, 02:51 PM

You paint it all in lemon drops and candy canes
Like nothing's wrong and everything's all right
You say you're happy on the other side
Or is that just the ice that's coursing through your veins?

Who are you? We change but we don't disappear
You've been gone and I thought I might find you here
If I just looked hard enough with a flashlight
But you're nowhere within sight and what is left
Is just an empty shell covering its emptiness
With light sweet words

I'm tired of watching your saccharin smile through all your pain
You were dark and now like the moon you're feigning light
But I'm not fooled, I know that you're still hurting
If you would let me, I would make it right.

If honesty would kill you, I guess you'll have to die in your sins
Which would be such a shame
Because I've died for them already
I'd save you from the darkness if only you'd admit
That there is something to be saved from and the darkness really exists.

It's not just a river in Egypt, you know.
You keep insisting you need to go. Fine, go.

SangReal · 11-10-2006, 02:40 PM

Skittles Five Years Later

What mistakes that we make
While we’re young and bright and beautiful
Innocent of things that could kill us if we’d known

If I’d known I think I’d make the very same mistake
That led me here in the first place
In search of something I should be learning

Could it ever have been different?
Free will, yes, but I was drawn here
Into and out of your gaze and your arms

I’m not sure that the hurt in his eyes
Would have been enough to hold me back
I was young and I wanted to taste and see

But it matters not now. He knows and he’s still here
And he’s mine and we are young and bright and beautiful
And full of anticipation, trepidation

Now if only there were another silver strand to tie this cord forever.
And we are trying to tie it together
With something young and hopefully bright and beautiful
If we can ever get it started.

01-11-2005, 02:44 PM	#101 (permalink)
SangReal Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: In Love Age: 24 Posts: 631 Points: 1,504.89 Bank: 21,023.62 Total Points: 22,528.51 Donate	If I ever had one wish I would be that you would die Disappear off the scorched face of the earth So I wouldn't hear your screams, and So you wouldn't haunt my dreams If I had a choice A place to push rewind And wind you firmly out of my mind Don't doubt for a moment I'd do it Because you never told me the truth I hope that you never knew That everything you said was a lie I hope you were an innocent bystander To someone else's deception I know this seems a grim set of wishes An evil combination of desires But it would all be for your own good Even while ruining mine Good day __________________ United States of America, looks like another silent night As we're sung to sleep by philosophies that save the trees and kill the children But You called me beautiful when you saw my shame And You placed me on the wall...anyway...

06-15-2005, 05:33 PM	#102 (permalink)
SangReal Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: In Love Age: 24 Posts: 631 Points: 1,504.89 Bank: 21,023.62 Total Points: 22,528.51 Donate	Note: This is a work of absolute fiction. It resembles no one, and if it does, the resemblance is purely coincidental (if you believe in coincidence, that is). You had lain in darkness for ages, our prayers over you growing fitful, our doubts increasing with each day, and our love stretching like a cat in the sun that has frozen in an uncomfortable position. We had just begun to lose it all, this wild hope that you were in there (somewhere) when the slightest graze of a finger over mine brought us all back to the beginning. We thought we saw it, but vision has a way of corrupting itself to allow us our dreams. I could not convince myself that I was awake, much less that you were after forever being "dead." I hated him for so long (careless driver, ex-lover) that I don't quite know what to feel. We were so close to the end of the line...to homicide. Such a dirty word that is, one man killing another, the ultimate desecration of the ultimate creation. Homicide. I shudder at the very murmur of the sound. So you moved, we thought. We were not sure. Tests were inconclusive, all that doctor gibberish that really means nobody knows. Doctors, with all their years of hard work and training, do not seem to be able to bear those three words: I don't know. It is not so difficult, is it, to admit that there is much we cannot know? And then with a heave of your chest, you drew the first breath into lungs that had not breathed on their own in months. Or so we thought. We were so afraid to remove the machines to test our little hypothesis. But we did, and you did, and all was well. We spoke to you, and you squeezed our hands. Hard to think it was you, once so alive. You were still a shadow of yourself, not life yet but certainly not death. The next day we all stood in a circle around you, and to our disbelief, your eyes opened. We did not know what to say or do except rejoice about you. Our prayers answered somewhat, but consciousness was not enough. It was a week or two before you spoke to us, but a whisper but still a sound from a throat we'd thought would never speak again. The words, however, were as stunning as the revelation of your rebirth. "Where am I, and who are you?" You did not know your own mother or father, and you did not know me, flesh of your flesh, bone of your bone. My heart was broken. I had prayed for your survival and not thought of my own, and in the process I'd lost the only thing I ever loved with all of me. I am lucky, I suppose, that you wanted to know me afterwards at all. All your old memories now come from albums and videos and not from actual remembrance, but I don't mind, I suppose. You did not love me at first, which is natural, I guess, for someone who is a complete stranger. (How odd it must seem to live in a world full of strangers. I'm sure you have insights like newborns now.) We played endless card games you'd forgotten, talked for hours, and went for ice cream every day. We ordered in pizza on Fridays and looked through pictures. I thought it was unfair that you didn't know anyone, so I resolved to teach you. You wanted to watch TV to discover the world again. And then, one beautiful day, you proposed to me. So here I sit, already your wife, dressed in pristine white, prepared to walk down the aisle again, this time for your sake. You make some silly joke about how it all seems redundant to everyone else, but it means a lot to you. So I will walk down the aisle and say "I do" again, kiss you again, cut the cake again, take endless pictures again, throw the bouquet again, and enjoy our wedding night...again. I hope this letter can do justice to the strength of our love through trial and tribulation. God is looking down with joy. Again. __________________ United States of America, looks like another silent night As we're sung to sleep by philosophies that save the trees and kill the children But You called me beautiful when you saw my shame And You placed me on the wall...anyway... Last edited by SangReal : 01-12-2006 at 09:50 AM.

09-07-2006, 02:51 PM	#103 (permalink)
SangReal Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: In Love Age: 24 Posts: 631 Points: 1,504.89 Bank: 21,023.62 Total Points: 22,528.51 Donate	You paint it all in lemon drops and candy canes Like nothing's wrong and everything's all right You say you're happy on the other side Or is that just the ice that's coursing through your veins? Who are you? We change but we don't disappear You've been gone and I thought I might find you here If I just looked hard enough with a flashlight But you're nowhere within sight and what is left Is just an empty shell covering its emptiness With light sweet words I'm tired of watching your saccharin smile through all your pain You were dark and now like the moon you're feigning light But I'm not fooled, I know that you're still hurting If you would let me, I would make it right. If honesty would kill you, I guess you'll have to die in your sins Which would be such a shame Because I've died for them already I'd save you from the darkness if only you'd admit That there is something to be saved from and the darkness really exists. It's not just a river in Egypt, you know. You keep insisting you need to go. Fine, go. __________________ United States of America, looks like another silent night As we're sung to sleep by philosophies that save the trees and kill the children But You called me beautiful when you saw my shame And You placed me on the wall...anyway...

11-10-2006, 02:40 PM	#104 (permalink)
SangReal Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: In Love Age: 24 Posts: 631 Points: 1,504.89 Bank: 21,023.62 Total Points: 22,528.51 Donate	Skittles Five Years Later What mistakes that we make While we’re young and bright and beautiful Innocent of things that could kill us if we’d known If I’d known I think I’d make the very same mistake That led me here in the first place In search of something I should be learning Could it ever have been different? Free will, yes, but I was drawn here Into and out of your gaze and your arms I’m not sure that the hurt in his eyes Would have been enough to hold me back I was young and I wanted to taste and see But it matters not now. He knows and he’s still here And he’s mine and we are young and bright and beautiful And full of anticipation, trepidation Now if only there were another silver strand to tie this cord forever. And we are trying to tie it together With something young and hopefully bright and beautiful If we can ever get it started. __________________ United States of America, looks like another silent night As we're sung to sleep by philosophies that save the trees and kill the children But You called me beautiful when you saw my shame And You placed me on the wall...anyway...

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