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Old 08-06-2006, 07:39 PM   #1 (permalink)
my_own_shad0w
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Your Eyes
here's another one i wrote, but this one i wrote it two years ago.. hope u like it!

I watched you floating in the water...
Drowning your emotions,
Drowning yourself in a sea of tears...

Your tears...
Your fears...

Fears tatooed in your skin,
Skin filled with scars,
Wounds that will never heal,
Bleeding your emotions...

Emotions kept in your eyes,
Your eyes in me...
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Old 08-06-2006, 09:57 PM   #2 (permalink)
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It's short, but it says a lot! Keep it up! I think it's great...and u have talent!
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Old 08-06-2006, 09:58 PM   #3 (permalink)
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I absolutely love the imagery! I love it!
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Old 08-08-2006, 11:56 AM   #4 (permalink)
Apryl
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Wow. I really loved that. I can tell that you are a very talented and creative person. You should try and write more, or make that one a bit longer. Your imagery is awesome. <3
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Old 08-08-2006, 12:23 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Good piece...I liked how you wrote it as the emotions of the person were the water they were drowning in...I just liked that idea. Very nice, I'd like to see some more of your work!
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Old 08-10-2006, 12:33 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Very powerful use of language!
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